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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

I want you to know that whatever problems you’re having, I’m hear to ‘like’ them.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

It’s so funny when someone writes a song to try to get someone to have sex with them. That’s what a bird would do!

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it’s fun not to be able to open that drawer.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

The thing about sleep is that I’d like to get some of it.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Traffic is the fault of the guy immediately in front of you.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

We used to have “spring, summer, fall, winter”. Today we have “drama, drama, drama, drama”.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Whoever has designed parking garages is either an architectural genius or an evil sadist.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

People delete their social media and start acting like they got a master’s degree in maturity.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Had calamari for the first time ever, and it wasn’t that bad. Maybe I’ll try marriage next.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

I’d be a horrible stalker… I’m always late.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

55 minutes ago

3,424

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I miss the days when you could simply end a phone call by slamming the receiver down angrily.

Trending via Discord:

Bought a pair of night vision goggles so that I can easily find the fridge at night without waking my wife.

Spotted on YouTube:

Just burned 2,000 calories trying to avoid someone I know at Walmart.

Going viral on Messenger:

I wish I could join, but I’m busy plotting revenge because my kids laughed when I showed them I can shake it better than Shakira.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m sorry I didn’t text you back. I’m really busy watching the The Lord of The Rings in the form of mini clips on TikTok.

Going viral on WeChat:

Please don’t buy my book on reverse psychology.

Trending via WeChat:

I tried to walk like an Egyptian and now I need to see a Cairo practor.

Breaking via X:

Sorry, I’m late. I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind.

Reported on Reddit:

Need a dimly lit cocktail date with a gaze so lustful it causes God to draft up another sin.

Just shared via Threads:

HR has told me to stop saying ‘How stupid can you be?’ to members of staff. They’re worried it’s being taken as a challenge.

Good morning, especially if they tried to make you go to rehab and you said “no, no, no.”

6 months ago

Good morning, especially if they tried to make you go to rehab and you said “no, no, no.”

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Good morning, rebels who refuse to be tamed by society's norms and institutions! 🌞 Just remember, sometimes saying 'no, no, no' to rehab might actually be the right choice… unless you're talking about 'rehab' for your addiction to hitting the snooze button on Monday mornings! 😜⏰ Stay strong and keep dancing to your own tune! 💃🕺"

amy, Amy Winehouse, denial, fun, good, humor, morning, rehab, winehouse

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

55 minutes ago

3,420

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Everyone’s a badass until the doorbell rings.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it’s “concerning”?

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

I think it’s time I find myself a new inspiration, asking myself “what would Batman do?” gets me in too much trouble.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

I’m a people pleaser, unless you don’t like that. Then I’m not.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

I made a resolution to eat better and exercise in the new year but didn’t specify which year I was referring to.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Wealthy person who has no problems and also meditates sometimes: Meditation is my secret weapon.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Don’t tell me about Stockholm Syndrome, I woke up at 6 AM on my first day of vacation wondering how things were going at work.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

Telling your parents about your problems is like adding another problem to your life.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Did you guys know that you can actually do whatever you want all the time?

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

You don’t scare me, I was married once.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

Reported on X:

Just spoke to my wife while the internet was down. She seems nice. She’s a nurse apparently.

Trending via Telegram:

Don’t even bother contacting me on the Ouija Board after I die. I barely answer my texts now.

Live now on LinkedIn:

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.

Just shared via Discord:

Nothing prepared me for the part of adulthood where you look like a baby deer learning to walk every time you get out of bed in the morning.

Spotted on Twitch:

Sometimes I feel useless but then I remember I breath out carbon dioxide for plants.

Reported on Slack:

Are you coming to the party? There will be noise and lights but I found a corner for us to hide.

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