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Commentary:
"Being called a cockroach may not sound glamorous, but hey, those critters are known for surviving just about anything! 🪳💪 Embrace your inner resilience… and maybe don't invite him to any future barbecues, just to be safe. 🍔😂"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

1 month ago
beginning, cars, deer, front, humor, irony, sacrifice, throw, understand, understanding, wildlife
If only guys would moan in bed like they do in the gym…

1 month ago
bed, guys, gym, humor, intimacy, moan, only, relationship, workout
I don’t freak out until I see the Buddhists freaking out.

1 month ago
anxiety, Buddhists, freak, freak out, humor, i, irony, mindfulness, reactions
Jeez. It’s like the people in this nursing home have never heard techno before.

1 month ago
before, elderly, fun, gap, generational, generational gap, home, humor, music, never, nursing, nursing home, party, people, techno
I’ll never be badass enough to walk around chewing on a toothpick.

1 month ago
around, attitude, badass, casual, casual attitude, chewing, confidence, enough, humor, never, self-image, toothpick, toughness, walk
You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

1 month ago
anxiety, bill, card, credit, credit card, debt, finance, humor, joke, me, scare

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

If I text you at 8:10, you’re supposed to reply at 8:09.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

The iPhone alarm is so effective that you wake up before it goes off, so you don’t have to listen to such an unbearable noise.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

I wish I had a pair of skinny genes.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

What’s wrong, babe? You hardly touched your own advice you give to others.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Being rich is going to look so cute on me.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

They should make you watch a training video and pass a little test before you’re allowed to touch the office coffee maker.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

Just when you’ve built some confidence that you’re a smarter than average human, universe sends you captcha.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

“I’m so good at doing nothing. I wish I could get paid for it.”

Going viral on Discord:

I’m so old, I still keep special moments in my heart and not in my Insta story.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I know some people don’t like me, but what can I do, not everyone has good taste.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I’ve never been married, but I tell people I’m divorced so they won’t think something is wrong with me.

Spotted on TikTok:

Is losing your mind a hobby?

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Activity Log ✨

He said he thinks I’m resilient to everything, so I thanked him, but on second thought, he may have low key called me a cockroach.

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

If only guys would moan in bed like they do in the gym…

I don’t freak out until I see the Buddhists freaking out.

Jeez. It’s like the people in this nursing home have never heard techno before.

I’ll never be badass enough to walk around chewing on a toothpick.

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

The concept of a drive-by doesn’t really exist in the swamp biome; instead, people rap about doing bog-emerges.

I don’t like the person I become when my boss tells me I should be working while at work.

Men’s jeans have bigger pockets to help them carry all their audacity.

Lazy Rule: Can’t reach it, don’t need it.

Welcome to your 50s, there’s a wrong way to stretch now.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I bet she doesn’t even laugh at your dumb jokes the fake way I did.

Water bottle leaking in your bag is a top 10 worst experience.

I wish I got hotter every time a man made me mad.

Therapy should be free and accessible because getting traumatized is free and accessible.

Stop rushing in the morning. You’re starting your day in panic mode.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I think you’re like the cat’s meow, annoying yet sweet.

Why is Subway asking me for a tip? Bro, we made this sandwich together.

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

What was the main bloke called in Harry Potter?

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

She is so narcissistic that her narcissism has narcissism.

Just paid rent. Now I have a place to starve in.

Sorry, I had feelings. I’ll replace them with jokes right away.

Did it hurt when you forgot your headphones and couldn’t romanticize your walk home?

Shopping at the dollar store makes me feel rich and poor all at the same time.

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He said he thinks I’m resilient to everything, so I thanked him, but on second thought, he may have low key called me a cockroach.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

If only guys would moan in bed like they do in the gym…

I don’t freak out until I see the Buddhists freaking out.

Jeez. It’s like the people in this nursing home have never heard techno before.

I’ll never be badass enough to walk around chewing on a toothpick.

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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