Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.
  • Being gracefully insane is the only way to survive life’s daily bullshit.
  • “Girls just want to have fun!” No, I want one million dollars cash.
  • Stretching is not enough. I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.
  • If I ever experience an earthquake, my first thought will probably be it’s Godzilla.
  • This year felt like being awake during surgery.