I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Sex is like my hair. I didn’t have any yesterday. I didn’t have any today. And unless something drastically changes, I won’t have any tomorrow.
  • Liquor on the top shelf is so expensive because the bartender has to stand on their tippy toes to reach it.
  • I can’t believe she picked her husband, her boyfriend and her other boyfriend over me.
  • Babies first steal your glasses and then bite your nose. I don’t know where they get their reputation.
  • Women aren’t complicated. Just give us attention and leave us alone.
  • I have read that there are imaginary pregnancies. The belly gets bigger and bigger, but there is no baby inside. Finally a diagnosis.