I don’t know who needs to hear this, but no one in the world is judging you as much as you’re judging yourself. People online: Hold my beer.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

If a girl sends you selfies and you don’t compliment her, she should be allowed to electrocute you.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Not sure if “life hack” exactly, but I fell down the stairs and now my whole family is being so nice and catering to my needs.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

In other news, congrats to my therapist for securing a 4 year contract with me.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

Due to rising prices, Dollar Tree is changing their name to ‘Tree Fiddy’.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Anyone who deals with customers on a professional basis should be allowed to hand out one face slap per day.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Getting old is not fun. Sometimes I have to check my texts and photos when someone asks me what I did yesterday.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

I only drink when I people.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Lie during your job interview because they’re lying to you about their great work environment.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

If only my teeth were as white as my legs.