Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I’d like to meet the person who decided that if you wanted to get married fast, it had to be done by Elvis.
  • Hold on, let me overthink this.
  • Just eating the emotional support snickers bar in my purse. How about you?
  • I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.
  • Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.
  • I will never stop being a quitter!