I don’t think I’d be so scared of spiders if they had eight tiny flip flops on.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.

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Post beach shower is undefeated. Greatest feeling a human could experience. Throw a nap in there, and you will never touch serenity so close.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

“There’s something beautifully intimate about never speaking to a person again.”

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

In Star Wars, anyone can hop in any spaceship and knows how to fly it. I just spent 20 minutes trying to find the headlights in a rental car.

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Starting your day with an early morning run is a great way to make sure your day can’t get any worse than it started.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Both my wife and my doctor said no more jumping on the bed. But they don’t get it. They don’t know what it’s like to live with the Monkey Instinct.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Women are like apples; I like biting them.