Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Are there any medium rappers? They’re always Big or Lil.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Just had a fight with every item in my closet. They started it.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Gonna close my bank account and keep all my money on me, like Sonic the Hedgehog.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

What would boomers do without their paper shredder?

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

My morning routine includes 20 minutes of staring at the ceiling thinking about how tired I am and debating if I really need to live today.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Toilets are not a crime scene, traces may be removed!

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

The only thing we need to bring back is duels.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Welcome to your 40s… you can now use this as an excuse not to help a friend move.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

242 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,511

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,511

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,235

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Tech enthusiasts: My entire house is smart. Tech workers: The only piece of technology in my house is a printer, and I keep a gun next to it so I can shoot it if it makes a noise I don’t recognize.

Trending via Pinterest:

Men’s jeans have bigger pockets to help them carry all their audacity.

Making waves on Telegram:

It’s exciting to receive a Valentine’s Day card and not know who it’s from. A Father’s Day card, not so much.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Everybody is fighting a battle that you don’t know about, because of the first rule of Fight Club.

Trending via WhatsApp:

If you’ve been talking for 5 minutes straight, it might be someone else’s turn.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I need someone to peer pressure me into doing things.

Just shared via TikTok:

“Bluetooth or Insane?” is a fun game we all play when we see a lone person speaking out loud in public.

Just landed via X:

All my favorite activities involve a mattress.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I brake for no one, except squirrels.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Every time someone tries to fight with me online, a middle finger gets its wings.

I had no social life in high school. Even my imaginary best friend had a date for the prom.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"High school: where even your imaginary best friend has a better love life than you 🤖🕺 #PromDateGoals"

best, date, even, friend, high, high school, humor, i, imaginary, imaginary friend, life, loneliness, prom, school, social, social life

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Always stay crazy. Otherwise you’ll go crazy.

0

2 months ago

always, crazy, health, humor, mental, mental health, stay
The only sunscreen that’s 100% effective is abstinence.

0

2 months ago

abstinence, effective, effectiveness, humor, protection, safety, sun, sun protection, sunscreen
When my wife packs for a trip she basically moves out.

0

2 months ago

humor, joke, move, moves, packing, relationship, travel, trip, wife
November doesn’t have afternoons. It’s just morning until 2 p.m., then night.

0

2 months ago

2, afternoon, daylight, funny observation, humor, just, morning, night, November, observation, seasonal, time, winter
I’m scared to go to an art museum, because what if they decide to keep me?

0

2 months ago

art, art museum, decide, fear, humor, keep, me, museum, museum visit, scared, visit
When you’re talking to someone and you can tell they’re trying out a new word.

0

1 month ago

communication, conversation, humor, interaction, language, new, social, social interaction, someone, talking, tell, trying, vocabulary, word

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on Snapchat this month:

Friends are God’s way of apologizing to us for our families.

51 shares on Pinterest this month:

Forget hot girl summer, it’s rot girl summer (laying in bed, reading books, laying under layers of soft blankets).

30 shares on Facebook this month:

I went to a mind reader. She almost went mad.

100 shares on Threads this month:

Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

85 shares on Discord this month:

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.

94 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My goal for next month is small, simple, and clear: change my whole entire life.

89 shares on Telegram this month:

The main cause of immigration is we’re still a country where people want to go, but we’re working on fixing that.

66 shares on Slack this month:

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a break after sending one email.

22 shares on Discord this month:

Windmill? Big fan.

66 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Quit keeping your enemies closer. No wonder you feel like shit.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

I’ve reached the conclusion that all men love thigh high stockings.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

I take offense when people don’t invite me to events l’d like to turn down.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

When I quit my job I’m setting one last OOO message that just says “your email will never find me again”

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

It’s fun getting room service. I just love eating a $19 hamburger at a desk in front of a mirror.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Anyone who thinks being a pessimist isn’t any fun fails to appreciate the joy of saying, ‘I told you so.’

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

Being sober would be a lot easier if I liked myself.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Whispering to paramedic before I pass out: save me, but not enough that I have to go to work tomorrow.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

Just shared via Slack:

If you love me, please don’t ask me to go camping with you.

Just shared via Twitch:

I would never put up a lost dog poster. I’m not letting the whole neighborhood know I fumbled.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Welcome to middle age, where you wake up hungover whether you’ve had a drink or not.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

It whistles, doesn’t it? Your head when it’s windy.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Twitter is fun because you can post a pic of pizza and people will get mad at you.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Tested positive for needing a kiss.

Trending via TikTok:

“Why would I lie to you?” I don’t know, maybe because you’re a liar.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Do you ever think about how many people squeezed the avocado that you’re eating?

Going viral on WeChat:

Just drafted the drunk text I’m going to send after one drink this weekend.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I had no social life in high school. Even my imaginary best friend had a date for the prom.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Always stay crazy. Otherwise you’ll go crazy.

The only sunscreen that’s 100% effective is abstinence.

When my wife packs for a trip she basically moves out.

November doesn’t have afternoons. It’s just morning until 2 p.m., then night.

I’m scared to go to an art museum, because what if they decide to keep me?

When you’re talking to someone and you can tell they’re trying out a new word.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨