Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Women love deciding to never talk to you again, and actually do it.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

I’m so desperate for a vacation that at this point I’d spend an all inclusive week at Jurassic Park.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

Single, not sure how to mingle.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

I don’t need a fancy watch to tell me I’m not fit one bit.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

On the one hand, I’d love to look sexy in a bikini. On the other hand, there’s cake.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

I don’t drink alcohol. I like suffering raw.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

An email so annoying, you wanna return the computer to the store.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

Divorcing my wife to focus on my porn addiction.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

47 minutes ago

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I’m just here trying to spread a little joy while the world burns. Is that so wrong?

Spotted on TikTok:

I can’t believe there was a time in my life when someone had to make me take a nap.

Just landed via Messenger:

Cowboy outfits should be called ranch dressing.

Breaking via WeChat:

“What fresh hell is this?“ It’s actually the same hell as yesterday. Not fresh at all, really.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

You know you don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there’s no law.

Seen just now on X:

Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I broke up with the gym. We were just not working out.

Just landed via Slack:

Well, maybe grass should touch me for once. How about that?

Seen just now on WeChat:

I feel a deep connection to librarians because I also love telling people to shut up.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Not wearing glasses anymore, I’ve seen enough.

I have money, then I don’t have money, it all happens so fast!

6 months ago

I have money, then I don’t have money, it all happens so fast!

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Living that rollercoaster life with our finances like 🎢💸💨 One minute you're feeling like a financial wizard, the next you're wondering where did it all go?! Remember, money can disappear faster than your favorite snack in a busy office breakroom! 😂💸 #WalletWhirlwind"

fast, financial, humor, i, life, money, spending

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

47 minutes ago

3,417

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

A massage is not enough, I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

You didn’t get fired, your job “fumbled you”.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

Not now, honey. I’m talking to strangers on the internet.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Hey, sorry I can’t go out tonight. I already showered and got into bed, and now I’m busy rubbing my feet together like a little grasshopper.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

My ideal vacation would be to drop my family off at the airport and then have a week of peace and quiet.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

I need someone to look at me the way I look at memes.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

I’ve got to start taking better care of myself. Tomorrow I’ll walk to the liquor store.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I did nothing wrong. I tried to do nothing and did it wrong.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I’m fairly certain the person who put the first “r” in February also decided how to spell Wednesday.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I like my music at a volume where I can’t hear you.

Freshly posted on Threads:

The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.

Trending via TikTok:

The hairdresser asking me what special plans I have for the day like this wasn’t it.

Just landed via Telegram:

April fools prank: replace all the sugar in your house with cocaine.

Going viral on YouTube:

I’m always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing.

Going viral on WeChat:

I fondly remember my days as a younger man when I didn’t care what the weather was going to do.

Seen just now on YouTube:

So many spreadsheets and not once did I feel excelled.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

And for my next trick, I will turn yesterday’s sweatpants into today’s sweatpants.

Breaking via Discord:

It’s a good friend who, when you want the truth, knows what truth you want.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴