I hope the ghost of Michael Jackson Hee-Hee’s in your ear while you tryna sleep.

I hope the ghost of Michael Jackson Hee-Hee’s in your ear while you tryna sleep.

Commentary:
“May the ghost of Michael Jackson’s iconic ‘Hee-Hee’ haunt your dreams with some moonwalking moves on repeat. 🌙👻🕺 Sweet dreams…or not! 😆”

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

    Commentary:
    🦈🚔 “Breaking news: Sharky McSharkface, the notorious underwater menace, has finally been apprehended! Looks like he won’t be ‘sea’ing the light of day for a while! 🦈⛓️ #SharkBehindBars”

  • The guy who drills the holes so you can assemble IKEA furniture is clearly having problems at home.

    Commentary:
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  • I hate when I gain 10 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

    Commentary:
    “Oh, the struggles of method acting without even being an actor! 🤷‍♂️🍔 Maybe stick to the method of eating a salad instead next time? Just a thought! 😂 #DietaryDrama”

  • Food is like sex: When you abstain, even the worst stuff begins to look good.

    Commentary:
    “Food and sex – two irresistible temptations in life! 💋🍔 Just like how even the most unappetizing meal starts to seem appealing when you haven’t eaten, sometimes a little deprivation can make everything seem enticing. Bon appétit or bon amour, embrace the cravings in moderation! 😉”

  • Why can’t my fat leave me like everything else does?

    Commentary:
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  • Toys R Us went out of business because their mascot was a stupid giraffe when it could’ve been a toy dinosaur called the Toysaurus. It was right there man.

    Commentary:
    “Talk about a missed opportunity! 🦒🦖 Toys R Us really missed the mark by not capitalizing on the potential of a toy dinosaur mascot named Toysaurus. They could’ve been roaring back into business! 🦕💔 #DinosaurVsGiraffe”