Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Trying to keep my craziness under wraps is like trying to contain popcorn 🍿 – no matter how hard I squeeze that lid, the kernels are going to burst out eventually! 😂🤪"

contain, craziness, expression, humor, i, lid, personality, popping, self-control

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Satan: “I’d tell you to go to Hell, but I work there and don’t wanna see you everyday.”

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2 months ago

everyday, hell, humor, i, ID, Satan, tell, work
I need someone to look at me the way I look at memes.

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2 months ago

admiration, attention, dating, humor, i, love, me, meme, need, passion, relationship, someone
If you don’t have dating allegations with your best friend, you are not bestfriending hard enough.

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2 months ago

allegation, allegations, best, best friend, bestfriending, dating, enough, friend, friendship, hard, humor, relationship
Abandoned amusement parks are so creepy. It’s no wonder they were abandoned.

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2 months ago

abandoned, amusement, amusement park, creepy, decay, fear, nostalgia, park, thrill, wonder
I hope whoever came up with the spelling for Wednesday was punished for their actions.

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2 months ago

actions, came, hope, humor, i, irony, language, punishment, spelling, Wednesday, wordplay
Congratulations on getting to the red light first. You’re special.

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3 days ago

congratulations, getting, humor, light, red, red light, sarcasm, special, traffic

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Threads this month:

It’s like 10,000 steps when all you need is a nap.

23 shares on Reddit this month:

Someone asked me how much I normally spend on a bottle of wine. Answering “usually an hour” wasn’t the right answer. I know this now.

89 shares on WeChat this month:

If ads were a person, it would be that one neighbor who won’t stop talking to you at the most inconvenient of times.

31 shares on Facebook this month:

I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve.

38 shares on Twitch this month:

I totally understand those uncles and aunts who don’t attend gatherings.

53 shares on Messenger this month:

All the leaves are brown. And this guy is Greg.

88 shares on Facebook this month:

Typos keep me humble. Every email is a gamble.

28 shares on Twitch this month:

Getting into male-dominated fields like falling asleep on the couch.

83 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Normalize booing in the workplace.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

Instead of saying “Good morning,” my wife and I go straight into explanations of how badly we each slept.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

I love when my husband says, “correct me if I’m wrong,” like I would pass up that opportunity.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

I love reaching into my messy bag looking for something and everyone around me hears like glass breaking and bombs going off and a cat meowing from inside there.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Remember when we were young we wanted to stay up for New Year’s? Now we’re old and cursing because we’re staying up past 9:30 and our entire sleep routine is disturbed.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Don’t forget to look directly into the sun for at least 10 minutes per day because that’s where all the vitamins are.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

No one is more hated than those two people who start a standing ovation.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

I don’t need to grow a thick skin. The world needs to grow fewer thorns.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

I think that police officers on foot should wear blue flashing sneakers.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

It’s strange being the same age as old people.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Snapchat:

I wish people would stop holding back and use social media to tell us how they really feel.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’ve been blocked, unfollowed, and unfriended, but I’ve never been told I’m bad in bed.

Making waves on Facebook:

Every day is leg day when you’re running from your problems.

Trending via Reddit:

Why procrastinate now when you can always procrastinate later?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The worst person you know is in therapy right now, being told they need to put themselves first.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

Going viral on Messenger:

If I’m ever murdered, I don’t want two women with a podcast solving the case in their spare time.

Just shared via Discord:

Friends with no kids are like: Want to go to New Zealand this Friday?

Shared recently on Facebook:

Once you start paying rent, every joke stops being funny.

Just landed via Snapchat:

“Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have” is all well and good until you’re rocking a tutu.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I try to contain my craziness, but the lid keeps popping off.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Satan: “I’d tell you to go to Hell, but I work there and don’t wanna see you everyday.”

I need someone to look at me the way I look at memes.

If you don’t have dating allegations with your best friend, you are not bestfriending hard enough.

Abandoned amusement parks are so creepy. It’s no wonder they were abandoned.

I hope whoever came up with the spelling for Wednesday was punished for their actions.

Congratulations on getting to the red light first. You’re special.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨