If a woman says “Do what you want!”, then for God’s sake don’t do what you want!

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

I need like twelve incomes for this lifestyle I have in my head.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Wife asked if I could stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe…

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

I’ve just turned off the news and put on a serial killer documentary to relax.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Might put on a bikini and run through your DMs.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m bringing back “holy moly” and nobody can stop me.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

I’m going to a karaoke bar tomorrow, where I’ll sing every song in the style of Yoko Ono.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

There should be a Mad Max movie that reveals the world outside Australia has actually remained pretty normal.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I’m grateful that thoughts don’t appear as bubbles over our heads.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

The sweet potato is the kindest vegetable.