If humanity is so smart, how come it took thousands of years after the wheel was invented for someone to put them on a suitcase?

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Told someone I’m as “single as a pringle and as neato as a dorito” and they blocked me immediately.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

I never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

The only narcissist I allow in my life is my cat.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

I accidentally poured vodka on my orange juice this morning. Twice.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Oh no, we don’t go in there. That room belongs to the spiders.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Just thinking how many animals we had to ride on before we realized horses were ok with it.

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I learn from the mistakes of people who took my advice.

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‘Sex with your ex’ is so stupid. If you want to dwell on the past, you can just buy a history book.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

Half of Twitter is horny, half is depressed and the other half don’t know how to do math.

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If you hide the Easter eggs while you’re drunk, nobody knows where they are.