Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I’m sorry you had a bad experience at our restaurant. To make it up to you, here is a coupon for more of our terrible, terrible food.
  • You guys know your secrets are safe with me. It’s the people I share them with you can’t trust.
  • Buying new glasses this week, so a whole bunch of you are about to get a whole lot uglier.
  • If the interviewer doesn’t think it’s cool when you pull a quarter out of his ear, the job wasn’t good enough for you anyways.
  • Just know that somebody out there is thinking of you, and you should really lock your doors.
  • Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.