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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Rise and grind your teeth gently while ruminating over every past mistake.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

You get what you pay for. Unless the delivery man leaves it on your doorstep. Then the fastest person on your street gets what you paid for.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Not to brag but I gave someone directions and he made it.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

I just wanna be rich enough to not have to run onstage after concerts to get my bra back.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

If only my teeth were as white as my legs.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

Socialism isn’t wrong because it has compassion. It’s wrong because it doesn’t work.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

This meeting should’ve been a fist fight.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Maybe women decided to convince men that beards were sexy because they were sick of cleaning the washbasin after he shaved.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2085 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,247

Funny Quotes Topics

14,988

Funny Quotes Images

12,247

1 minute ago

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

You either get a kid who eats like a bottomless pit, or you get one that when asked what they want for lunch answers “No thanks, I had lunch yesterday.”

Going viral on Facebook:

I don’t know if I’m still tired or already tired.

Shared recently on YouTube:

My ex said I had commitment issues but this giant jar of Nutella says otherwise.

Just shared via Twitch:

The best way to enjoy your tea while the world is falling apart around you is to remember that the world has always been falling apart around you.

Trending via Snapchat:

I’m pretty sure by now that we’re some kind of satire channel on some other planet.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Date night idea: fight another couple.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Women in movies look so beautiful when they sleep. Meanwhile, I’m tossing and turning all night like a forgotten 7-Eleven hot dog.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I got us matching straight jackets for Christmas.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Be careful when you follow the masses sometimes the M is silent.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Pro Tip: Never make snow angels in a dog park.

It is kind of inspiring that I messed up my life without drugs, gambling or a troubled youth. People really can do anything.

6 months ago

It is kind of inspiring that I messed up my life without drugs, gambling or a troubled youth. People really can do anything.

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Commentary:
"Who needs wild nights out or teenage rebellions when you can mess up your life the old-fashioned way – with pure determination and stubbornness! 🌟💪 Here's to proving that you don't need to follow the traditional paths to achieve epic levels of chaos. Keep breaking the molds, my friend! 🎉😂"

drug, gambling, life, motivation, people

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2085 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,247

Funny Quotes Topics

14,988

Funny Quotes Images

12,247

1 minute ago

3,429

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

I hate when an old man tries to friend me on Facebook and then I realize we went to high school together.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Very difficult being a full grown adult with a terrible fear of being “in trouble”.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

I’m at the age where I can remember things that never happened.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I may look fine on the outside, but on the inside I’m hungry again.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Feeling weird from my cookie-based diet.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

Driving is great because it combines my love of sitting with my love of being mad.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Silence is golden. But duct tape is silver.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

I would definitely deny being from here if the aliens pulled up and asked. Not claiming this embarrassing planet in front of intergalactic travelers, are you dumb?

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Are people born with photographic memories or do they take time to develop?

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

My couch better stop looking at me like that, it knows exactly what it’s doing.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

Threatening my husband with tariffs every time he tries to make me watch sports on TV.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I don’t have time for anything that doesn’t set my soul on fire.

Just shared via Threads:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not dying, it’s just Thursday.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I am at the age where I question throwing away a box because, “It’s a really nice box.”

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I’ll kill the vibe, so you don’t have to.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I’m proud to announce that am winning my fight against sobriety.

Making waves on Snapchat:

My superpower is holding onto stuff for years and throwing it away exactly one week before I need it.

Going viral on YouTube:

Petition to bring back payphones in public places. I don’t want to give my kid a phone, I want to give him a quarter.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Nobody knows my next move. Not even me.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

The goth urge to live in a haunted Victorian estate and be feared by the townspeople.

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