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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Starting drama with me the week before my period is an absolutely terrible idea – for you.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Boyfriend hasn’t accepted my LinkedIn request yet. He doesn’t want to connect. He doesn’t want to build.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Every time I blink, it’s Monday again. I can’t live like this.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

I only go for nature walks with people I can outrun.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Man, these end times are taking forever.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

They should list at least one alien “as himself” in the Star Wars credits.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

I just think we should kiss. And kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss and kiss. But that’s just me.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I don’t carry my wallet to work because I’m afraid someone will steal it while I’m sleeping.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m not being smart, I’m just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

815 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,977

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,977

11 minutes ago

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

The 80s were wild, man. You had bands naming themselves after predatory cats with hearing problems.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

The perfect number of cats is two stupid cats. Preferably siblings. But they can’t both be the same type of stupid. One needs to be stupid (dumb) and one needs to be stupid (annoying).

Just shared via Twitch:

Every time I see a dog with its head out a window, I know it’s having a better day than I am.

Seen just now on YouTube:

If you occasionally blow on your bourbon during a Zoom meeting, the other folks will think you’re enjoying a hot cup of tea.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Remember: if nobody hates you, you’re not trying hard enough.

Seen just now on Messenger:

When I write “I hope this email finds you well” I’m referring to the email’s skills in tracking you down.

Just shared via Telegram:

I like my men like I like my coffee. Not that hot but still making me anxious.

Making waves on WeChat:

As president, I will allow people to use the same password as before when changing their password.

Seen just now on Threads:

Odd people reviewing a dessert: It’s not too sweet which is what I like.

I’ve reached a point in my life where if I can’t find parking, I’m just going to go home.

4 months ago

I’ve reached a point in my life where if I can’t find parking, I’m just going to go home.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who knew that finding a parking spot could be the ultimate make-or-break moment in adulting? 🅿️🚗 Sometimes the struggle is just too real that surrendering and heading back home seems like the only logical option! 😂 #LifeGoals #ParkingStruggles"

convenience, frustration, going, home, humor, i, just, life, parking, point, priorities, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

815 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,977

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,977

11 minutes ago

3,417

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

What if your dog one day just randomly said “Nobody is going to believe you” and never spoke again.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

My favorite things about Texas are definitely toast and chainsaw massacres.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

Wow, you have a very impressive collection of strange tendencies.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

I’m a freak in the spreadsheets.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

The dopamine hit of getting an Outlook meeting cancellation is unrivaled.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

You have been a very bad boy. Now go to my room!

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Kids these days don’t know the shame of having to explain yo-yo injuries.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

“Bluetooth or Insane?” is a fun game we all play when we see a lone person speaking out loud in public.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Me drinking green tea: this is going to fix everything.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

Moms be like, “Your cousin’s neighbor’s husband’s aunt died. Just thought you should know.”

Live now on WhatsApp:

Stop hating yourself for everything. Be specific.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Rich people go to parties. It’s what they do, and somehow we must all watch videos of it.

Making waves on X:

The question is, what will kill humanity this century? Artificial intelligence or natural stupidity?

Making waves on WeChat:

Went out of town, came back and the roomba changed all the locks.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I really don’t get enough praise for someone who doesn’t need validation from others.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Having a low quality camera will definitely force you to keep your life private.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Whoever is writing my Rom-Com, can you maybe, I don’t know, START IT?

Broadcasted on Slack:

I need money, not feelings.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I could be a morning person, if morning was sometime around noon.

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