Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the modern miracle of technology! Who needs therapy when your body can effortlessly convert trauma into social media currency? 🤖💪🔥 #TurningPainIntoPopularity"

body, experience, experiences, humor, likes, machine, media, social, social media, traumatic, traumatic experience, x

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Having a job ruined my life.

0

2 months ago

career, frustration, having, humor, job, life, ruined, sarcasm, work
There’s nothing I hate more than a failed nap attempt.

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2 months ago

attempt, dislike, failed, failure, frustration, hate, humor, i, nap, nothing, relaxation, sleep
This chapter of my life is called ‘at least the rent is paid’

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2 months ago

adulting, chapter, financial, financial status, humor, life, life chapter, paid, positivity, rent, self-deprecation, status, struggles
You can always gauge my mood by the type of animal videos I share: sweet puppy videos or a cat smacking the shit out of someone.

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2 months ago

always, animal, animal video, behavior, cat, emotions, humor, i, media, mood, pet, pet behavior, puppy, share, sharing, shit, social, social media, someone, sweet, type, video, video sharing, videos
Due to inflation, you can now eat food that has been on the floor for up to 7.3 seconds.

0

5 months ago

due, eat, eating, floor, food, humor, inflation, joke, seconds, time
Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

0

2 months ago

3d, 3D printing, apology, aviation, delay, flight, flight delay, fuselage, humor, just, little, maintenance, printing, time, waiting

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on TikTok this month:

A dinosaur as a pet would solve so many problems. Mainly, people problems.

100 shares on Facebook this month:

Introverts don’t recharge with sleep, we recharge by being left completely alone for 3–5 business days.

32 shares on Facebook this month:

Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

13 shares on Twitch this month:

My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors.

64 shares on Discord this month:

Gonna mess with my husband by texting “send nudes” when he’s in a work meeting.

65 shares on Facebook this month:

Twitter is the most fun you can have on the toilet.

49 shares on Discord this month:

I need something good to watch while I’m on my phone.

52 shares on Instagram this month:

The woman that cleaned my house could make a lot of money by threatening to release the before and after photos.

49 shares on Twitch this month:

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

22 shares on Reddit this month:

Blocking anyone who tries to motivate me.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

I love when certain people post their dating app convos, and you get to see what a conversation between two really boring people looks like.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Ugh, sometimes I just wish there was a song about liking to move it, move it.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Fasted for 72 hours and gained the ability to whisper to bats.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Time machine? You mean a clock?

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Just saying “Think about it!” is enough to overwhelm many people these days.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

I’m so single, I have no one to drunk text.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Is there a bravery award I can nominate my son for as he managed to eat his toast despite the fact I cut it wrong.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

I feel sorry for dogs. They learnt to fetch newspapers, but newspapers are dying. Killed by an internet driven by cats.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

If paying a cashier a living wage will make prices go up, why doesn’t replacing cashiers with self-checkouts make prices go down?

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

Unfortunately, it only strengthens my spirit when the summer people mourn their terrible season.

Seen just now on Telegram:

My fitness goal is to lose two straight jacket sizes.

Seen just now on Discord:

Hey babe, wanna come over and fold me like a fitted sheet?

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I got us matching straight jackets for Christmas.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

I wish flies spoke English, so I could say, ‘Hey, if you don’t leave right now, I am going to kill you so hard.’

Breaking via YouTube:

Being gracefully insane is the only way to survive life’s daily bullshit.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

My new drivers license arrived and when I opened it, I gasped. How’d they get a picture of my mother?

Just landed via Reddit:

The feminine urge to be the most feared witch in the village.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My body is a machine that turns traumatic experiences into 10 likes on X.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Having a job ruined my life.

There’s nothing I hate more than a failed nap attempt.

This chapter of my life is called ‘at least the rent is paid’

You can always gauge my mood by the type of animal videos I share: sweet puppy videos or a cat smacking the shit out of someone.

Due to inflation, you can now eat food that has been on the floor for up to 7.3 seconds.

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨