Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"I think my brain is a browser from the mid-2000s with a gazillion tabs open 🤯🌐. Can someone please press Ctrl + Alt + Delete for me? 💻🔒"

brain, confusion, humor, multitasking, open, tabs

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

0

2 months ago

balance, decision, focus, girlfriend, humor, job, love, quitting, relationship, thinking, work life, work-life balance
I can understand why chickens wake up and scream.

0

2 months ago

chicken, humor, i, morning, scream, understand, wake, wake up, why
The absolute hottest thing you can do in front of a woman is tame a horse, but unfortunately, modern life affords us little opportunities for that.

0

4 hours ago

attraction, front, horse, hottest, humor, life, little, modern, modern life, opportunity, tame, thing, unfortunately, us, woman
When it rains in New York, the train starts smelling like hamster.

0

2 months ago

city, city life, hamster, humor, life, new, New York, public, public transport, rain, smell, train, transport, york
Do you ever wish you could just walk away mid-conversation when you’re bored?

0

2 months ago

away, awkward, awkward moment, bored, boredom, conversation, ever, interaction, just, moment, social, social interaction, walk, walking, walking away, wish
Just heard my knee crack so loud I expected it to glow in the dark.

0

2 months ago

crack, dark, funny injury, glow, humor, humorous, humorous moment, i, injury, joke, just, knee, knee crack, light, light joke, loud, loud sound, moment, noise, physical, physical humor, sound, unexpected, unexpected noise

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on YouTube this month:

Studies show people who like my posts are happier, smarter, and better looking than those who don’t.

70 shares on Facebook this month:

I am the opposite of artificial intelligence. I am authentic stupidity.

56 shares on Instagram this month:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. How many minutes did you spend listening to your girlfriend this year?

96 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m starting to think that the secret to having a happy life is avoiding people.

31 shares on Reddit this month:

A person’s character can be read quite reliably from the way he or she interacts with service personnel.

89 shares on YouTube this month:

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

26 shares on X this month:

After a lot of experience, I can conclude that one can never actually cross “washing dishes” off the to-do list.

41 shares on Pinterest this month:

It’s cold and dark outside, made me think of you.

12 shares on Slack this month:

Remember, when a package says “sharing size”, that’s just a guideline. They have no enforcement mechanism.

38 shares on Telegram this month:

My spirit animal is a sloth on its fourth nap of the day!

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

The rain is pouring. So naturally it’s a good day to eat 6 donuts.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

Being an adult is getting excited about buying new appliances.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Do I need to have seen the Tokyo Olympics in order to understand the Paris ones?

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

If you would just let me help, you’d be in an even worse position than you are now.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Stop expecting people to be as cool as you, it’s a recipe for disappointment.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

“Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)” is now 40 years old. If you have an earworm now, you also have back pain.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Siblings are proof you can love someone and also dislike them at the same time.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Why put off until tomorrow what you can have an intern do today?

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Doesn’t matter, Your Honor! I, for one, found it very funny.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

It’s Friday. Rules don’t apply.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

Breaking via WeChat:

Life is just a vicious cycle of needing to go to the grocery store.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.

Just shared via TikTok:

If I had a boyfriend, I’d put him in a snow globe and shake it really hard.

Just landed via Threads:

Made the mistake of believing what I was told again.

Going viral on Messenger:

Adulthood is saying “but after this week things will slow down a bit” over and over until you die.

Going viral on Telegram:

My favorite exercise is a combination of a lunge and a crunch. It’s called lunch.

Trending via Pinterest:

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

Spotted on Instagram:

Establish dominance by maintaining eye contact whilst twerking.

Making waves on Messenger:

Your reply guys are like Pooh Bear. They wear no pants and are relentlessly trying to get in your honeypot.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My brain has too many tabs open.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

I can understand why chickens wake up and scream.

The absolute hottest thing you can do in front of a woman is tame a horse, but unfortunately, modern life affords us little opportunities for that.

When it rains in New York, the train starts smelling like hamster.

Do you ever wish you could just walk away mid-conversation when you’re bored?

Just heard my knee crack so loud I expected it to glow in the dark.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨