Trendy Funny Quotes

  • My sex face is the same as my first pee in three hours face.
  • Me: Maybe it’s the weed talking but your apartment seems enormous. IKEA Manager: Sir.
  • There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them.
  • Asking the pharmacy if they have a secret menu.
  • May her tire get flat with a dude who can’t change it.
  • Sometimes I need a break from myself but it’s like, ugh, everywhere I go there I am.