Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Born to be a Jedi spinning a lightsaber, forced to work full-time and pay rent.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Just because I loved you at one point doesn’t mean I will always love you. I’m not Whitney Houston.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

I can’t believe there was a time in my life when someone had to make me take a nap.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

They should have a section on the wing of the plane where people can go out for a cigarette.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

If you’re dating an alpha female, you need to know that they need to be babied at night, or else they will turn into a dragon.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

If at first you don’t succeed, it’s only attempted murder.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

You’re so productive for your wage.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Does anyone know what to do, like in general?

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

I accidentally poured vodka on my orange juice this morning. Twice.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

I wish my midlife crisis made me want to get a gym membership and a revenge body, but instead I’m eating Snickers for breakfast in bed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

515 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,108

Funny Quotes Topics

17,263

Funny Quotes Images

15,108

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

3,598

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on X:

The internal struggle between wanting to be productive and just wanting to nap all day.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I like to live life dangerously by occasionally sticking my foot out over the edge of the bed at night.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Welcome to adulthood. The weekend is your only time to catch up on everything, but also your only time to do absolutely nothing.

Just landed via X:

Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.

Breaking via X:

You don’t get to tell me what to do, you’re not my cat.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m getting close to that age where people applaud the things I’m “still able to do”.

Live now on WeChat:

Flies are literally obsessed with flying into a room, then pretending they can’t get out. Grow up.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I made up all these romantic scenarios in my brain and you’re not following the script.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

My patience is like a gift card, not sure how much is left but lets give it a try.

Shared recently on WeChat:

My life is a constant cycle of waiting for the weekend.

My OnlyFans is just me loading the dishwasher correctly.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I have a photographic memory, but I’ve run out of film.

0

2 months ago

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Being the introverted hopeless romantic with a high sex drive is a curse.

0

1 month ago

being, curse, drive, high, hopeless, hopeless romantic, humor, introvert, personality, personality traits, romantic, sex, sex drive, traits
Imagine if every time you ate a grape you’d hear a soft voice whisper “that was my son…”

0

2 months ago

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I’m never more unattractive than when a bee flies in my face.

0

2 months ago

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By the way, if you don’t buy anything on Black Friday, you can save up to 100%.

0

2 months ago

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You can’t have a bad day at work if you don’t go.

0

2 months ago

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New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on YouTube this month:

I never sit around waiting for anyone except for the pizza delivery guy.

50 shares on Messenger this month:

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

64 shares on Facebook this month:

Still holding out hope that these intrusive thoughts are just gas.

58 shares on WeChat this month:

My most boomer complaint is that nobody knows how to bring an item out of courtesy to parties anymore.

26 shares on WeChat this month:

If the first thing you do in the morning is checking your emails, you’re starting your day with other people’s problems.

33 shares on Facebook this month:

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

74 shares on Messenger this month:

I hate when I get ready too quickly and have to sit on the couch, fully dressed, and wait like an idiot.

49 shares on Threads this month:

Tonight, my poor liver has to pay again for what went wrong during the week.

21 shares on WeChat this month:

Used to wonder why my parents couldn’t grasp technology, but now, anytime I see something new, I’m like, “I’m not learning that.”

91 shares on Snapchat this month:

Having a nicotine addiction is basically just adding a new base layer to Maslow’s hierarchy for no reason.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

“Delusional” ain’t a strong enough word to describe people anymore.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

I think you misunderstood – when I said, “Let me look into it,” that meant, “I don’t know exactly how to tell you no just yet.”

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

We used to burn CDs like we were running an underground record label.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I don’t have time for anything that doesn’t set my soul on fire.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Nostalgia is mostly dumb nonsense, but movie rental stores were legitimately better than streaming.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Instagram is run by celebrities. Twitter is run by the streets.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Life is pretty much just a series of awkward and embarrassing moments, separated by snacks.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

No offense, fellas, we love compliments, but a compliment from another woman means just a little bit more.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Bugs Bunny taught me that my choices aren’t limited to fight or flight, I can also pretend I’m a pretty lady.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Instead of being constantly irritated by other people’s flaws, I’ve decided to become more self-absorbed.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via YouTube:

Overheard a baby crying in the grocery store the other day so I went over and joined him. I get it, little dude, life is hard.

Trending via WeChat:

Not enough rap songs about stores suddenly changing their layout.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

The first person to ever throw up was probably like, “Ok, what the hell.”

Spotted on Facebook:

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

Broadcasted on WeChat:

I’m looking for friends with benefits. And by that I mean friends who have pools, boats and beautiful vacation homes.

Going viral on TikTok:

Imagine playing Truth or Dare and they dare you to go home.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I drive safer when there’s food in my passenger’s seat than when there’s a person sitting there.

Seen just now on X:

4 sneezes in a row is clout chasing. Wrap it up!

Spotted on Discord:

Bone broth? Oh, you mean skeleton soup.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Unlike smoking, vaping doesn’t reduce your sex drive. It just reduces the sex drive of the people who see you vaping.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

My OnlyFans is just me loading the dishwasher correctly.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I have a photographic memory, but I’ve run out of film.

Being the introverted hopeless romantic with a high sex drive is a curse.

Imagine if every time you ate a grape you’d hear a soft voice whisper “that was my son…”

I’m never more unattractive than when a bee flies in my face.

By the way, if you don’t buy anything on Black Friday, you can save up to 100%.

You can’t have a bad day at work if you don’t go.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨