Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Look, babe, I’m sorry. If your fake British accent keeps being this geographically inconsistent, I’m going to have to cancel the medieval roleplay sex.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

All my passwords are protected by short term memory loss.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

Got my dog microchipped, so if he runs away, I can just press a button, and he’ll explode.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Sometimes you choose the GIF-war over your responsibilities.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

My savings account has been empty for so long that a Spirit Halloween just opened up inside it.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Strange new trend at the office. People putting names on food in the company fridge. Today I had a tuna sandwich named Linda.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

The weather’s got more mood swings than a reality show reunion.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

Either you’re violently frolicking with me or you’re violently frolicking against me.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

I concern myself with the opinions of sheep because they are cute.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,608

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via TikTok:

I support robot taxis. How else are robots supposed to get around?

Freshly posted on TikTok:

The worst thing about having children is the parents of the other children.

Going viral on TikTok:

You gotta separate the art from the artist. Like, for example, sometimes the artist is really nice but their art sucks.

Just landed via WeChat:

Babe, is everything OK? You’ve barely accomplished anything at all in your entire life.

Live now on WhatsApp:

“God has a plan for you.” OK, is God open to a little feedback?

Going bananas on Facebook:

I’ll stop smoking weed when life stops smoking me.

Making waves on Reddit:

Mothers be doing unnecessary housework and then get mad at you when they’re tired.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

If kids these days had a perfume, it would be called Audacity.

Breaking via Threads:

Stop blaming yourself for your failures. Learn astrology and blame the planets.

Just landed via Reddit:

Welcome to your 50s, there’s a wrong way to stretch now.

My sweatpants sat me down and said they want me to get an office job again.

6 days ago

Playful quote about sweatpants jokingly urging a return to office work.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🤣 Ah, the classic "intervention" moment by the sweatpants! Looks like it's time to retire from the cozy lounge life and dive back into the world of office attire. Good luck explaining the office dress code to your comfy companions! 🩴👔 #SweatpantsVsOfficeJob

again, casual, casual wear, humor, job, me, office, office job, procrastination, sweatpants, want, wear, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

100 shares on Snapchat this month:

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, “Oh no, it’s a cop”?

65 shares on Instagram this month:

Sugar held my hand through every breakup.

12 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t understand, “kill them with kindness”; can I use a lightsaber instead?

19 shares on LinkedIn this month:

People my age are raising children, and I’m just here trying to bribe myself with treats into doing my own chores.

43 shares on Snapchat this month:

If I can’t wash dishes to your album, it ain’t that fire.

67 shares on Threads this month:

If love is the answer then what was the question?

92 shares on YouTube this month:

You can make friends in a doctor’s waiting room as long as you have something broken and not something coughing.

47 shares on Snapchat this month:

If every day is a gift, today is socks.

43 shares on Reddit this month:

Duolingo does everything except actually teach you the language.

96 shares on WhatsApp this month:

You want to go out in the sun and then you can’t get the couch through the door.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t stand when people need constant validation online. Like, comment, and share if you agree.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Updating my resume. Anyone got a more professional word for “dumpster fire”?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Be careful when you follow the masses sometimes the M is silent.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

You didn’t let me know you got home safely so you better at least be injured or I’m gonna be pissed.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Car rides by yourself with loud music… they’re good for the soul.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes being a woman is just trying to figure out if you’re hormonally sad, seasonally sad, or genuinely falling apart.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Drive as I say, not as I drive.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag, but my wife just described the dinner I made as “interesting.”

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at my most math when I solve a problem while creating three new ones.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,593

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Do you mind if I wear my black T-shirt covered in pet hair to your fine dining establishment?

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Countries are just gangs with paperwork.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

I’ve calculated my December budget and realized I can only afford to pray.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

You don’t really see women throwing their boyfriend’s stuff out the window anymore.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

God: “I don’t regret the Flood, but I do regret the Ark.”

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

For security reasons, I highly recommend that you leave one of your children home during the holidays to set elaborate booby traps in case of intruders.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I need a browser plugin that disables Amazon when I’m drinking. Hashtag: don’t drink and Prime.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Going out on Friday night will always be better than going out on a Saturday night.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

They should make the last foot of dental floss red so you know when you’re about to run out.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

The first time I heard “big naturals,” I thought it referred to major outdoor landmarks such as the Grand Canyon or the Great Barrier Reef.

Just shared via Twitch:

Old age is always 15 years older than I am.

Just landed via Threads:

If you’re not happy single you won’t be happy married. Happiness comes from eating food, not from relationships.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Spent 20 minutes training ChatGPT to write the perfect anniversary note for my wife, so don’t try to tell me I’m not romantic.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Sometimes life is “Eat, pray, love,” and sometimes it’s “Scroll, snack, overthink.”

Just landed via X:

Just realized when I get a partner, that means my family is gonna know that I have feelings.

Just landed via TikTok:

Misses Claus only married Santa because of his big sack.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

You know it’s bad when people start telling you, you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

Trending via Discord:

Women’s fall fashion is basically coming up with ways to wear a blanket without it looking like you’re wearing a blanket.

Just landed via Slack:

There will always be miserable people inviting you to their misery.

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