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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

If you’re tired of “food” and want to try something a bit more sophisticated, may I recommend “cuisine”?

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

You can recognize working-class kids by the fact that they hang their jacket over the chair in the restaurant and not on the coat hook.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Kinda psycho that there’s a clothing brand called “Banana Republic.”

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

I’m only awake because my coffee needs me.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

If I was in Jaws, instead of wishing for a bigger boat, I probably would have just asked for a smaller shark.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

My card got declined at the barbershop so they put all the hair in my mouth and squeezed me until it came out of my head.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

According to the web, caffeine deficiency is a life threatening condition for people around you.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

Wow, this was a really long day of playing on my phone.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

You’re in her DMs, she’s in my bed whining that it’s too cold. Can you come get her?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,345

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Discord:

We don’t make people walk the plank like we used to.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

I’ve worn oversized T-shirts so much that I suffocate if I wear one that actually fits.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Just walked by an empath and his head exploded.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Let’s get married and have kids, so instead of relaxing during weeknights, we can go to seven practices and relearn algebra.

Going viral on Twitch:

*Googles: How to fake your own death and erase existence before 9am Monday morning.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Babe, wake up, it’s stupid outside!

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Rudolph’s bright red nose would not have done anything to improve Santa’s visibility in dense fog.

Seen just now on X:

My fight or flight response has frequent flyer miles.

Trending via Discord:

The human brain is great. It works from the second you are born and stops as soon as you start liking someone.

Making waves on WeChat:

Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

No, I don’t like nature. I can’t respect anything that would so flippantly turn dinosaurs into birds.

Witty quote about nature and dinosaurs, humorous and playful in tone.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Nature: where dinosaurs go to reinvent themselves with a feathered makeover 🦕➡️🦖➡️🐦 Who knew evolution had a flair for fashion? 🌿 #NatureTransformations #DinosaursAreBirds"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

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Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on WeChat this month:

It’s legally required that you lose a frisbee onto the roof within one week of purchase.

38 shares on TikTok this month:

Tweeting shouldn’t cost money but it should flip you on your back like a bug for 15 minutes.

75 shares on Discord this month:

Twitter is Iike the smoking area for social media.

49 shares on Discord this month:

I like online shopping and putting everything I want in a cart, then checking my subtotal and laughing and closing the tab.

75 shares on Reddit this month:

Americans are funny, man. “It’s 72 degrees outside.” Bro, I don’t speak oven.

15 shares on Telegram this month:

We need to stop telling AI that it’s paintings are bad. That’s how Hitler got started.

24 shares on TikTok this month:

You should be able to call out of work if your partner is so cozy and warm in the morning.

44 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t know how to explain it, but sometimes cheese just falls into my cart at the grocery store.

59 shares on X this month:

If you see this, straighten your back, you banana-shaped mess.

30 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Girl, if the moon can block the sun, then you can definitely block your ex.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Babies invented being in a bad mood for no reason, and they continue to innovate in the field.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Work from home is all fun and games until you lose grip on reality.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

The lion does not concern himself at all. The lion is depressed.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Behind every strong, independent woman… is a dog that follows her to the bathroom.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

When you thought something would be easy peasy lemon squeezy, but it’s actually been stressy, depressy, lemon zesty.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

One thing about me is I don’t even need to get drunk to act a fool.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

The ability to adjust your vocabulary based on who you’re speaking to is a valuable life skill that many people lack.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

People who can fall asleep quickly freak me out… I mean, don’t they have thoughts?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Excuse me sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,527

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Chuck Norris can rub two fires together to get a piece of wood.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

You never forget your first kiss. Or your first meeting with HR.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

I’m not saying Lois Lane is a bad investigative journalist, but my friend Greg didn’t wear glasses to work yesterday and I recognized him by lunch time.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

Blocking him isn’t enough. I want his favorite sports team to finish last every year for now and forever.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Ghosting is disrespectful unless it’s me doing it.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode them bikes when we were younger.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

I just tried to groom my dog myself, and I now fully understand why the dog groomer charges more for a haircut than my own stylist.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

Whoever named frogs got it 100% right. Those things are frogs.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

My friend thinks he’s smart. He said onions are the only food that makes him cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Only 6 hours, 45 minutes and 35 years until I’m done with work.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

Better to be an overthinker than an overdrinker.

Breaking via Discord:

I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Not looking for a sugar daddy, but something more of a pay pal.

Live now on Facebook:

Today’s book recommendation: “The Art of Silence” by the famous Chinese philosopher Shut-Up.

Shared recently on TikTok:

The only ex I cheated on is my exam.

Live now on Telegram:

It’s so unfair that saying “xd” is still socially acceptable, but only if you’re speaking Spanish.

Going viral on Threads:

Please be nice to me. I’m in my twenties. Do you know what that does to a person?

Live now on Facebook:

Paycheck hit. I’m at Michaels Arts & Crafts supply store telling them to bring out Michael.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Starting to think I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I miss when my hardest decision was Nickelodeon or Cartoon Network.

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