Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Please no more relationships that are supposed to be a lesson. I’m already quite the scholar.
  • My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.
  • Many people mistakenly believe that diamond is the hardest substance on earth, but in reality it is my husband’s stubborn head.
  • I always carry a knife with me in case I run into someone with 10,000 spoons.
  • My home security system is just a copy of my paycheck taped to my front door.
  • Pretty sure the guy in front of me at McDonald’s ordered the rest of the food.