Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

  • My girlfriend wants us to try couples counseling and I said we should use my therapist because he already knows whatโ€™s wrong with her.
  • If youโ€™re gonna spend so much time in my head, would it kill you to tidy up a bit?
  • Good morning. May your day be as beautiful as I am.
  • If the zombie apocalypse happens weโ€™re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.
  • Just a friendly reminder folks. Donโ€™t forget to set back your rooster this weekend.
  • Ever since I was a little kid, I knew that I wanted to be late for work.