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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ญ has downloaded:

Mixed signals mean they donโ€™t like you like that. Itโ€™s that simple.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has copied:

One thing I miss about the pandemic is getting to rip my mask off like I just botched a surgery.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has shared:

I wish there was a nicer way to say โ€œmy natural tendency to spot patterns is making me feel very uncomfortable about youโ€.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ธ has viewed:

My bad if I ever left you on read. I didnโ€™t mean to open the message.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has shared:

Just found out about confirmation bias, and now every article I read totally proves I was right to be worried about it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has viewed:

ADHD is when you buy a blender and then make smoothies every day for 2 weeks, and then never make one or even acknowledge your blender ever again.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ป has copied:

I don’t remember if I took my pills, but I can’t check because I can’t remember where I put my glasses.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฏ has viewed:

Subtitles are for when youโ€™re eating chips.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ผ has downloaded:

I’m so glad when summer is over and I finally don’t have to see any feet on the internet anymore.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡ช has downloaded:

I am the opposite of artificial intelligence. I am authentic stupidity.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

431 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,700

Funny Quotes Topics

17,718

Funny Quotes Images

15,700

Updated

Jan 13, 2026

Users Online

3,418

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Trending via Slack:

You can tell itโ€™s laundry day because Iโ€™m wearing flippers and a Viking helmet.

Trending via WeChat:

I ate my exam paper. Which means that pretty soon I’ll pass the test.

Just landed via Threads:

There is nothing worse in life than calling customer service and hearing an Indian accent.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Dogs are like chicken nuggets; every time I see one, I want it.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

“Kiss From a Rose” makes you think Batman Forever is the most romantic movie ever made.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

Spotted on TikTok:

Unfortunately for everyone, I will keep doing whatever I want.

Seen just now on WeChat:

But if i put my laundry away, the laundry chair will be out of a job.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

There is no bigger lie than “fun for the whole family”.

Going viral on Messenger:

The shitshow must go on.

Our parents were right all along, the music is too loud.

Our parents were right all along, the music is too loud.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
๐ŸŽถ "Our parents were right all along, the music is too loud." ๐ŸŽต Looks like we've officially reached the age where we appreciate a quiet night in over a raging concert! ๐Ÿ˜‚ Who knew we'd actually start missing the sound of silence? ๐Ÿคซ #FeelingOldButWise

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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

Social Media Stars โญ

63 shares on Instagram this month:

I would love to go back to the days when the biggest stress was finding the best hiding place when playing hide and seek.

81 shares on Discord this month:

If I say โ€œwith all due respect,โ€ nothing respectful is about to come out of my mouth.

51 shares on Threads this month:

Touched a tree and accidentally absorbed 400 years of wisdom and 2 squirrel secrets.

96 shares on Messenger this month:

Like, who are those little paper umbrellas trying to protect?

81 shares on Slack this month:

Can someone write me a note to get out of being a responsible adult?

62 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m just falling in love with my problems now. Maybe they’ll leave me too.

46 shares on YouTube this month:

They monitor me harder than Britney Spears around here.

49 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Bon Jovi must be at least 3/4 of the way there by now.

14 shares on Instagram this month:

Heard a recording of my own voice, and now I can never speak again.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

17 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

The answer is a cabin in the woods, by the way.

19 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

My dad thought Siri would be more helpful finding a lemon ricotta recipe if he used an Italian accent.

21 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I enjoy driving because it combines my desire to sit with my talent for being angry.

9 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Maybe somewhere in a parallel universe, I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic each day.

10 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Shooting a gun in the air to get everyone’s attention, then immediately getting shy and sheepishly twisting my shoe in the dirt and blinking bashfully.

9 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Love how Batman: The Animated Series seems to take place in the 40s and the 50s and the 70s and the 90s all at once.

6 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Knowing Iโ€™ve been called crazy, but never ugly, is how I sleep at night.

13 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Apparently, when you treat someone the same way they treat you, they get offended!

20 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

For my next trick, I’ll watch a two-hour movie in four.

13 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Mondays are for pretending. Real work begins on Tuesday.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

431 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,700

Funny Quotes Topics

17,718

Funny Quotes Images

15,700

Updated

Jan 13, 2026

Users Online

3,644

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡ธ has shared:

Desperately seeking my soul, mate.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡น has shared:

What archaeologists are really looking for is a hand digging back.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡ณ has bookmarked:

Losing weight is basically all about being cold 90% of the time.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has downloaded:

My dream car is a taco truck.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ has shared:

You can tell a lot about someone based on which Spice Girl they were most attracted to.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

The best part about Smarties is pouring them into an empty prescription bottle and shaking them all into my mouth while waiting in line.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ช has copied:

Never vacuuming so I donโ€™t disrupt my carpetโ€™s natural micro biome.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has downloaded:

Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can’t eat or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has shared:

I like my messages, how I like my nuts โ€“ MIXED.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฉ has downloaded:

There are no laws against pineapples on pizza.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Going bananas on Telegram:

Babies sighing is so funny to me. My dear, the time to sigh has not come.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Hate when youโ€™re trying to take a nap and the dentist is all โ€œPlease open your mouth.โ€

Shared recently on Facebook:

Thanks for your email! Unfortunately, I have filled my pockets with stones and am making my way to the sea.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Thanks to rice cakes, I still can’t imagine nothingness, but now I know what it tastes like.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Fun fact: Malcolm X was not his birth name. He was originally Malcolm Twitter.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

My husband saw a rabbit in our yard eating grass and said โ€œThat would be like sitting in a field of french fries.โ€

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

I don’t see why walking is healthy. Zombies walk constantly and they look awful.

Trending via Threads:

An escape room, but itโ€™s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and youโ€™re over 40. Good luck!

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Porn is free, so why are you in my DMs?

Going viral on Instagram:

Once this pandemic ends, Iโ€™m legit quitting video games and getting a girlfriend for real.

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