Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

I took the road less traveled because I was hoping not to run into anyone I know along the way.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

I hate when I turn my car on in the morning and the music starts blasting, and I am like, “Whoooah, big fella, I’m not the same person I was last night.”

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

It’s like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Dads were right. Walking around with your hands behind your back and looking at everything around with a mild look of disgust and annoyance is so much fun.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

When they dress up really nice, but all you can think about is the thrill of taking it off.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

This whole “having a job” thing is really getting in the way of me having my best life.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball is not for throwing at people who stress you out?

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

3,661

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

Forrest Gump is a haunting film about how long you have to wait for a bus in America.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

Just shared via Slack:

Stages of Christmas shopping: 1. There’s plenty of time. 2. Oh no!

Trending via Facebook:

Whispering to paramedic before I pass out: save me, but not enough that I have to go to work tomorrow.

Going viral on WeChat:

Do you think protein wants to be in all these things?

Trending via Threads:

Having a daughter is like having a little broke best friend who thinks you’re rich.

Just landed via Telegram:

Do you scroll through Netflix to find a good show for your dog to watch when you leave the house or are you normal?

Just shared via Threads:

Feelings are like children. You don’t want them driving the car, but you shouldn’t stuff them in the trunk either.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Romance level: At some point, someone comes by, sees me and thinks: “Oh well, my God, why not?”

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Can I come over and look at your Hot Wheels collection?

More funny quotes 👇

No, don’t worry about him, babe. That’s just my soulmate.

0

5 months ago

babe, humor, joke, just, love, partner, relationship, soulmate, worry

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you’re cheering for the stormtroopers, we cannot be friends.

50 shares on Slack this month:

If I’m too much, go find less. I’m not running a clearance sale.

52 shares on Reddit this month:

Nobody gets angrier than a man being accused of something he actually did.

53 shares on Discord this month:

Nothing prepared me for the part of adulthood where you look like a baby deer learning to walk every time you get out of bed in the morning.

58 shares on Slack this month:

“Don’t shoot your gun at the hurricane” the government says. I’ll do my own research, thanks.

21 shares on WeChat this month:

I wish I could put an AirTag on my sanity.

35 shares on Threads this month:

“Your password is too weak.” OK, well, I created him in my image.

37 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I hate being around people who mistake my childlike wonder as naivety or weakness. I am simply a war general who loves to giggle.

62 shares on Telegram this month:

Wish I could get paid just for being a sweetheart.

90 shares on WeChat this month:

A haunted house, but it’s just a room full of people asking you to tell them a fun fact about yourself.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Hey, if the Earth could stop air frying me, that’d be great.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

When someone yells stop I don’t know whether it’s in the name of love, it’s Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

If someone texts “Do you have a minute,” it’s a trick. Don’t fall for it.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

My career plan? Win the lottery and disappear.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

“In a galaxy far, far away” is starting to sound quite enticing.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

The moon is literally dragging the oceans around, and you think your body shouldn’t feel it?

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

I’d be a terrible masseuse. After 5 minutes, I’d be like, “Okay, my turn.”

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

Relationships are only serious when photos are posted by a man.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

These days I just accept the website cookies without any protest. Website is like Grandma, I’m not gonna fight with you.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

Welcome to your 40s: you’re not having a midlife crisis, you’re just awake.

Just landed via X:

In an effort to keep our house clean before Thanksgiving, I’ve asked my family to go live somewhere else.

Seen just now on X:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Men used to go to war, now they want to be the little spoon.

Making waves on Threads:

Pouring rain, football on TV, empty house; the stuff dreams are made of.

Just shared via Threads:

If a zombie and vampire bite each other, who turns who?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I love being outside, just not when it’s too cold or too hot or too wet or too windy or if there are bugs.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

No we can’t hangout, you’ll end up falling in love with me and I don’t have time for that.

Making waves on Facebook:

I broke up with the gym. We were just not working out.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Getting a lawn sign so people know what I think today.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

No, don’t worry about him, babe. That’s just my soulmate.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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