Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Thinking about writing my own eulogy because I don’t want my loved ones to say I’m a control freak.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Is Mercury in reggaeton?

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

If I was lying down and someone came up and gave me tons of kisses and smooshed my face, I’d love it. I don’t know what my cat’s problem is.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

If hot showers aren’t good for you then why do I emerge from them bright red like a beautiful ruby?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

The final level of being smart is just pretending you don’t know anything to make your life easier.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Welcome to middle age, where you wake up hungover whether you’ve had a drink or not.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Thank you, Facebook memories, for constantly reminding me of the shitty taste in men I had for the majority of my life.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

It’s a beautiful morning. Lots of people out walking their phones.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Sorry, I missed your call. I watched it ring and everything.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

Just paid rent. Now I have a place to starve in.