Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.
  • First they give you butterflies, then mental health problems.
  • I no longer need an alarm clock because I’m over 40 and have a bladder.
  • It’s interesting growing up and discovering that most adults are not that clever. I had my suspicions as a kid but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.
  • Baby for sale. Refuses to wear shoes.
  • Don’t worry password, I’m insecure too.