Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

I’m accused of being a plagiarist. Their words, not mine.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Whoever is writing my Rom-Com, can you maybe, I don’t know, START IT?

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Establish dominance by asking your dentist if he’s flossing everyday.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Superwoman: Single. Batman: Single. Wonder Woman: Single. I get it now, I’m single because I’m a superhero.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

I miss the old days back in 1955, when I didn’t exist.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

I wonder if my guardian angel and my future husband’s guardian angel are in a group chat trying to coordinate.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

I feel like waking up early on the weekend is so disrespectful.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Sorry, I wasn’t really listening but that’s awesome, unless it isn’t of course.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

I have some fart jokes I’ve been holding in.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,267

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

My red flag is that I don’t make playlists on Spotify. I just add every song I’ve ever liked to the ‘Liked Songs’ playlist and shuffle that, like an iPod.

Shared recently on Discord:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

Trending via Discord:

I’ve had so much tea trying to get rid of this cold that I’m now speaking with a British accent and am fascinated with the Royal family.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I’ve learned the best way to find something that I’ve lost is to buy a replacement one, to make the lost one spontaneously appear.

Shared recently on Reddit:

So my wife goes, “It’s not you — it’s me.” Obviously written by ChatGPT.

Seen just now on Facebook:

The real miracle is how Jesus managed to book a table for twenty-six people on the night before the Easter holiday, and then only half them showed up.

Live now on Slack:

I’m so old, I used to cry as a child because I fell off my skateboard or bike, not because I didn’t have wifi.

Shared recently on Slack:

My mom and all her opinions are visiting this weekend.

Seen just now on Slack:

Mambo No. 5, but it’s in a minor key, and I’m naming women who didn’t text me back.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

If you put a pizza on top of a pizza, you have two pizzas. But if you stack two lasagnas, then you still have one lasagna.

Went outside. Touched grass. Got bit by bugs. Zero stars.

3 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Humorous quote about outdoor mishaps and bug bites, with a playful, sarcastic vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Me trying to embrace nature: 🌿🌞

Nature's response: 🦟🌿🚫

Well then, Mother Nature isn't holding back with her rating system! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ 😂"

bugs, experience, grass, humor, nature, outdoor, outside, review, stars

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Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on X this month:

I wish I got hotter every time a man made me mad.

100 shares on Slack this month:

Stop telling people to grow up. Have you seen adults?

46 shares on Facebook this month:

The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice-cream.

74 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.

73 shares on Reddit this month:

Normalize saying, “I’m not informed enough to have an opinion on the matter.”

64 shares on Reddit this month:

Do people exist who manage to wash, dry, fold, and put away their laundry in the same day?

60 shares on Slack this month:

Halloween is a big day for dogs who love to absolutely lose their shit when the doorbell rings.

83 shares on WeChat this month:

Who called it a Cybertruck and not a Deplorean?

89 shares on Pinterest this month:

To the person who stole my place in the queue. I’m after you now.

85 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m at that point on a Monday where no.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

Transgender ambulance driver whose pronouns are we/you/we/you/we/you.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Last year I had no valentine, this year I also have no valentine. Consistency!

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Life tip: If all of your bathrooms are full and you’re waiting for someone to finish, just turn off the WiFi in the house.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

The best thing about dogs is you can act like something really good just happened, and they’ll instantly start celebrating too. They have no idea what the context is; they’re just always ready to party, no matter what.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

What if you went to ET’s planet and all of the other ET’s were wearing clothes?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

Hey, so this Mercury retrograde is actually really demonic and soul-crippling. Let’s wrap this up by midnight.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

A service where you bring a working printer to my house, I print the one thing I need, and you leave again until next year.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

I can’t wait to buy Chanel bags on a random Tuesday for me and my friends.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

My parents told me I could be anything I wanted so I became unacceptable.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

An Amish party in the desert called churning man.

Shared recently on Threads:

Money doesn’t impress me. Giving it to me does.

Just shared via YouTube:

When is someone actually going to change the surprise in the avocado? This hard core is kind of a stupid toy.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will be acting weird today.

Just landed via Instagram:

(british guy unhooking your bra) All right, what’s all this, then?

Spotted on YouTube:

I don’t have any generational wealth but I did inherit a great spaghetti sauce recipe.

Just landed via Reddit:

Valentine’s Day is a stupid and made up holiday unless someone wants to give me a present in which case I really believe in celebrating it.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I’m going back to the 90s, if anyone wants to come.

Going bananas on TikTok:

I hate how l am a “I have an appointment at 4pm so I can’t do anything all day” type of person.

Going viral on Instagram:

You ever look at yourself on the self-checkout camera and think, “wow, I better write my will.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Went outside. Touched grass. Got bit by bugs. Zero stars.

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

There’s a certain nothing about you.

The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

When my cat gets in trouble I call him by his full name, Catthew.

My future husband and I will be stay-at-home parents, and the kids will go to work.

If your problem can’t be fixed by coffee, tequila or sex then I’m out of advice.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Went outside. Touched grass. Got bit by bugs. Zero stars.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

There’s a certain nothing about you.

The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

When my cat gets in trouble I call him by his full name, Catthew.

My future husband and I will be stay-at-home parents, and the kids will go to work.

If your problem can’t be fixed by coffee, tequila or sex then I’m out of advice.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨