Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?
  • “Do it scared!” Thanks, but I have done everything scared. When is it my turn to do it calm?
  • To cut the long story short, I have spent all my money.
  • Reverse cowgirl because first dates are awkward.
  • “You win some. You lose some.” Me, after losing for the millionth time in a row.
  • Sundries sounds like something grandma would call scandalous underwear.