Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

The nerve of a majority of people I meet being younger than me. How dare them?

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Having to write cover letters is so dumb. Do you really believe my dream ever since I was a little girl was to work for you? No. It was to ride a pony on a funky space rainbow. Grow up.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Is it okay for me to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school, or am I just a terrible teacher?

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

Get in loser. We’re going on a guilt trip.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

My dog just tracked and successfully located a folium lanceolatum, more commonly known as a leaf.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Some people post such depressing love shit that I start to miss their exes myself!

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m not your dream woman. I am the sudden shouting of ravens that you hear when you enter a part of the forest you shouldn’t have.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

“I’m going to try underthinking about a situation, and see if that works.”

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I want them to get lice.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

I’m only staying up until midnight on New Year’s to watch that bloody year die.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,417

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I wanted to sleep it off, but insomnia said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

Shared recently on Facebook:

The true horror genre: my old Facebook statuses.

Going viral on Pinterest:

What must a pancake think when it’s being flipped? Doubtless something jolly.

Live now on WhatsApp:

This is not what adulthood looked like in the brochure.

Trending via WhatsApp:

You know you’re getting old when you’re entering your birth year online and you need to spin that thing like you’re on wheel of fortune.

Breaking via Slack:

Waiting for my wife to approve my new year’s resolution of making independent decisions.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Never feel bad when people roll their eyes while you talk to them. They’re just looking for their brain.

Spotted on TikTok:

Imagine the carnage at an IKEA team building event.

Trending via Instagram:

I lied, there’s no sex. Can you tell me a bedtime story?

Trending via X:

I’m staying up past midnight this New Year’s eve. Not to welcome the new year, but to make sure this one is over.

Why call it a “step dad” when you could have called it a faux pas?

4 weeks ago

Witty text about blending "step dad" with a humorous pun, playful and clever.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, the pun-tastic potential of blending family dynamics with fancy French phrases! 😄🇫🇷 It's certainly a faux pas not to appreciate the humor in our everyday relationships. Step aside, stepdad, here comes the faux pas with all its accidental charm! 😉 #DadJokeGoals

call, dad, family, faux, faux pas, humor, jokes, parenting, pas, play, relationships, step, step dad, why, word, word play

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

96 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Apparently I’m the reason why I never have any money. I am shocked!

68 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Born to say “Who the hell raised you to be this stupid.” Forced to work in groups.

26 shares on WeChat this month:

Everyone’s a gangster until the grocery store switches their aisles around.

37 shares on WeChat this month:

I wish I had the free time of someone who leaves a positive Amazon review for a rake.

10 shares on Telegram this month:

If I unsubscribe from your email list, I definitely do not need you to send a follow-up email to confirm.

84 shares on Discord this month:

If you’re looking for a quiet place to talk to yourself, my DMs are open.

85 shares on Facebook this month:

Later is the best time to do anything.

35 shares on Pinterest this month:

Rapunzel, let down your CVS receipt!

24 shares on Instagram this month:

Not many things sadder than an untickled fancy.

68 shares on X this month:

All the leaves are brown. And this guy is Greg.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I talk to myself in the same condescending tone, so you’re not special.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

American Feng Shui is when the grill doesn’t wobble.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Flex on strangers by asking them if they remember you.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

You didn’t lock in hard enough if you’re not feeling asexual.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If you can’t laugh at yourself, I will.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I just refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good to watch.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I watch “Law and Order” so much that when I turn off the TV, I wipe my fingerprints off the remote.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I just need a day between everyday… to recover from the day before… just so I can prepare for the day coming.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Indiana Jones is a fantasy about being a professor with no admin duties.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can get sleep paralysis.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,351

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

My ability to remember song lyrics from the ’90s far exceeds my ability to remember why I walked into the garage.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies. She is not “fun to be around”.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

This whole “having a job” thing is really getting in the way of me having my best life.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Common sense isn’t a gift. It’s a punishment, because you have to deal with everyone who doesn’t have it.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Regrettably, my children appear to have befriended a child I find annoying.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

The easiest diet is lack of money. You don’t have to do anything.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

If I were Juliet, I would NOT be pleased to find a man standing under my balcony at midnight. Sir, I am in my jim-jams.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

No matter how sad you are, there is some form of potato that can make it better.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Hate when I have to be mean. Why would you push a sweet girl this far?

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Get in loser, we’re going overthinking.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

Accidentally clicked a post about UFOs, and now my Facebook algorithm thinks I’m a much different person.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Why are those Mad Max guys always driving around, it’s not like there’s anywhere to go?

Just landed via Telegram:

Desperately searching the dating app settings for an option to turn down the difficulty level.

Making waves on Threads:

Men be like “I hate drama,” and then have love triangles, secret babies, a wife, side chick, ex that’s still around, breadcrumbs, and unhealed trauma.

Trending via Messenger:

I truly wonder what it sounded like when Medusa washed her hair at night.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Wait, making the right choices is an option?!

Trending via Threads:

I’m really glad that light only attracts insects. Imagine wild boars would come knocking at your windows all the time.

Going bananas on Telegram:

I am the proud father of two content providers. I mean children. Two children.

Just shared via Threads:

If someone asks you if you’re in the queue, what they actually mean is “you’re really shit at queuing, aren’t you?”

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Checking a selfie only to find there’s a demon in the reflection behind you, and it looks significantly healthier than you.

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