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Commentary:
"Maybe aliens are avoiding us because they heard how we never respond to voicemails 🌌👽 Let's work on proving we're not the only intelligent species right here on Earth 🔍🌍 #smartypants"

aliens, Earth, everyone, existence, exploration, humor, intelligent, intelligent life, irony, life, looking, perspective, space, start

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Holding it together with duct tape and sarcasm.

2 months ago

coping, duct, duct tape, holding, humor, laughter, life, life struggles, resilience, sarcasm, struggles, tape, together, wit
Anyone want to meet up and just scream… We could get food after.

4 weeks ago

activity, after, anyone, food, humor, just, meet, meet up, scream, social, social activity, want
They should invent someone who holds me.

2 months ago

companionship, hold, humor, invent, invention, loneliness, me, should, someone
I wasn’t made to hustle and bustle. I was made to dilly and dally.

5 months ago

bustle, dally, dilly, humor, hustle, i, laziness, procrastination, relaxation
You didn’t get fired, your job “fumbled you”.

2 months ago

fired, Fumble, humor, job, workplace
If I met someone like me, I’d be really concerned for them.

2 months ago

concern, humor, i, ID, me, meeting, personality, reflection, self, someone

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on Discord this month:

“Well, this is no good. How do I turn it off?” – The first primate to experience consciousness.

74 shares on Facebook this month:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the last twelve digits of Pi.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

Controlling your anger at work is a job in itself.

30 shares on Slack this month:

Needing to rant and not wanting anyone to know your business is such a crazy combo.

55 shares on Twitch this month:

When your kid asks you where the other parent is, they’re really saying that they’d like to speak with the manager.

13 shares on Telegram this month:

Gardeners are the only people who willingly go outside to get dirty, sweaty, bitten, and sunburned… and call it “relaxing”.

19 shares on Telegram this month:

I don’t have read receipts on my phone because why would I tell on myself like that?

95 shares on Telegram this month:

Nothing is complicated when you’re simple-minded like me.

53 shares on X this month:

You ever have one of those days that require the use of both of your middle fingers?

65 shares on Messenger this month:

My superpower is embarrassing myself.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Life is so exciting. I was in my bedroom and now I’m in the living room. Who knows where I’ll go next.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

Somewhere, a therapist you never met knows about you.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

I have more photos of food on my phone than I do of my children.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

I think it broke my boyfriend’s heart when I said he couldn’t have Salma Hayek for Valentine’s Day.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

The real threat to Democracy is the Bureaucracy.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

They say the best things take time. That’s why I’m always late.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

Please be delicate with me, I’m built like a Nature Valley bar.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

People who have apartment windows that face the street and put their Christmas trees in them, thank you for your service.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

Dear diary, sorry for only ever talking about myself. How are you? Do you have any hobbies?

Going viral on Instagram:

My hair will never allow me to commit any crime; I leave my DNA everywhere.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I hope you can hear me thinking about you.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

At my age, you check a friend’s Facebook page to make sure they’re still alive before wishing them a happy birthday.

Spotted on TikTok:

Not to sound like a potted plant, but sunlight and fresh air really make a difference.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

This is not what adulthood looked like in the brochure.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I’ll be like “it is what it is” and almost vomit from anxiety.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I love reaching into my messy bag looking for something and everyone around me hears like glass breaking and bombs going off and a cat meowing from inside there.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Situation monitoring is not for the uncaffeinated.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I’ve tasted being the bigger person, I’ve also tasted matching energy. I recommend no contact.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Why is everyone looking for intelligent life in space? Can we please start on Earth first?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Holding it together with duct tape and sarcasm.

Anyone want to meet up and just scream… We could get food after.

They should invent someone who holds me.

I wasn’t made to hustle and bustle. I was made to dilly and dally.

You didn’t get fired, your job “fumbled you”.

If I met someone like me, I’d be really concerned for them.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨