50+ Funny Men Jokes That Prove Guys Are Comedy Without Trying

New funny men jokes

• Women pretending not to see men staring at them is an essential survival skill.

• Women only want one thing, and it’s the power to cast men who tell us to smile right into a pit of giant venomous serpents.

• I love men with a provider fetish.

• Men be like: I would love the opportunity to give you the bare minimum.

• Men used to send love letters in the middle of wars, and now they think reassurance is too much effort.

• Nonchalant men are not for me. I want mine to have a panic attack if we’re not talking.

• Men love when you ask them to explain something to you. It is considered a sign of deep respect in their culture.

• Men used to go to war, now they want to be the little spoon.

• This generation of men makes celibacy so easy for women.

• Men are only nice for 3 weeks, then surprise you with another personality.

Top funny men jokes

• Dear men, my ‘biological clock’ isn’t my weakness. It’s your final deadline to prove you’re worthy.

• Thank you, Facebook memories, for constantly reminding me of the shitty taste in men I had for the majority of my life.

• Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can die.

• I don’t know what’s more fun—grocery shopping or making the old men blush by asking if these melons look ripe.

• Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can get sleep paralysis.

• I’ve cooked for men I should have poisoned, so yeah, I do have self-control.

• We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch Love Island, like men do with sports.

• Grown men asking Grok if this is real.

• Men be like “I would do anything for you,” and then do nothing.

• Men invented arm wrestling so they could hold hands and look into each other’s eyes.

Popular funny men jokes

• If only men knew the power “I made reservations, I’ll pick you up at 7” held instead of “I don’t know, whatever you wanna do.”

• “It’s Raining Men” and “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor” are the same song from different points of view.

• Men have nice skin because they stress out everyone but themselves.

• The older I get, the more I understand why Grumpy Old Men exist.

• Most men don’t actually want to do things; they just want to talk about doing them.

• Men become instantly more attractive when they wear aviators; it’s science.

• If white men can’t jump, how do you explain Super Mario?

• Weird how I can’t seem to reach anything at the grocery store when hot men are around.

• God created childbirth so women could know how men feel when we have a cold.

• Men be like, “But I’m different.” Yeah, a different type of disappointment.

More funny men jokes

• Why can’t men admit when they doze off? What’s wrong with them?

• Girl talk is my favorite. You go from discussing goals to talking about shoes, to hating men, to planning a trip in six minutes.

• Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

• Why don’t straight men and lesbians hang out like straight women and gays do?

• The leading cause for injury in old men is them thinking they are still young men.

• The only downside to dating hot men is that when it ends, he’s still hot.

• The way men eat when they’re single is nothing short of dehumanizing.

• Men used to build castles for women they love, but now they think replying on time is too much effort.

• Why would I date a nonchalant man? I like my men how I like my thong.

• Short men store so much anger in their little body.

Witty men jokes

• Men love to show you a YouTube video. It is a sign of deep respect in their culture.

• Men will ruin your whole life then come back and like your story.

• Do men know they don’t have to keep their clothing until it disintegrates?

• Men make it so easy to hate them.

• Men used to go to war, now they drinking matcha.

• I like my men like I like my coffee. Not that hot but still making me anxious.

• Men with bibles names be the worst type of people.

• Men used to smoke Marlboros. Now they cry when they lose their strawberry cheesecake vape.

• One big difference between men and women is that if a woman says “Smell this,” it usually smells nice.

• Men only have money the first month of dating, that’s recruitment budget, never confuse it with operational budget.