You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not a jar of Nutella.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

I’m pretty sure my husband’s favorite sound is the oven range fan turning on when I start making dinner.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Whenever I’m with real yappers, I realize I might actually be a listener.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

The closest thing I’ve had to a personal trainer is the ice cream truck that drove past my house.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

They should remove the sex scenes from movies and then put them all into one big super sex scene movie they can show in theaters at the end of the year.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Sorry, can’t. I’m too busy growing new neural pathways to make space for a stranger’s opinion. Evolution takes bandwidth, man.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Considering that doctors are never on time, they should tell you to come a half hour late, not early.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

So tonight me and my phone are playing hide and seek. So far my phone is winning.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Not to brag but there are so many movies out there that have watched me sleep.