So many people to disappoint, so little time.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

If I were a category, I’d be “miscellaneous.”

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Unfortunately, the movie you want to watch is unavailable on your 13 streaming services. You can rent it for $2.99 though.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

“Just circling back on this.” – “Take another lap.”

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Might start signing off emails with ‘well, I hope you’re happy’

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

Ever since I was young, I knew I wanted to be online nonstop.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

When I see chocolate, I hear two voices inside me. One says: “Eat it!”. The other says: “Did you hear that? You’re supposed to eat it!”

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

I failed as a person; I’m a dinosaur now.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

The toddler refers to every baby as Baby [Name], like Baby is their formal title.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Stores should accept “I bought this while depressed” as a valid reason for a return.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve.