I am so lucky that I can’t tell the difference between a heartfelt compliment and sarcastic disdain. Life is much easier when you’re dumb.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Listen to the birds, not the news.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Don’t ever forget where you came from. That’s where you left your car.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

I saw someone wearing a shirt today that said “Eat Pasta Run Fasta,” and I can’t get it out of my head.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Next to nothing is a weird place.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

Soccer: I love when they hold up the sign and a brand new, beautiful boy takes the place of a dirty, sweaty, ruined one.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

Canadians are nice because they’re close to Santa.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m bringing back “hold your horses” and nobody can stop me.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

May her tire get flat with a dude who can’t change it.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

His voice was like whiskey. Smooth with a slow burn that lit me up from the inside.