TOPEKA—In a groundbreaking revelation, billionaire and philanthropist, Arnold Lindberg, declared that his money will only impress him if it’s given away. “Just watching it in my account? Yawn,” confessed Lindberg. “Throwing dollar bills out the window? Now we’re talking.”

Lindberg’s unorthodox approach has sparked interest among the affluent. “It’s like reverse bank robbery,” noted fellow billionaire Elise Carter, who promptly began practicing by tossing wads of cash from her penthouse.

Economists are baffled. “It’s fiscal chaos shrouded in benevolence,” stated Professor Jeremy Wells. While Lindberg toyed with a money confetti cannon, local citizens were seen scrambling for windblown bills, treating them like golden tickets to out-of-stock basic groceries.