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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

At the first signs of a sore throat, you should be given the option of just skipping four days into the future.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

Having your own apartment by yourself is so funny, cause I really just swept the whole place naked.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Situationship where the situation is being madly in love with each other.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

I miss the way I viewed the world before I found out too much about it.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

My mom and all her opinions are visiting this weekend.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

If we start dating now, we could be arguing on a road trip by August.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

I just tried to poach an egg and I now understand why Eggs Benedict is $23

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Don’t worry, guys. Together we can eliminate logic and reason on social media. I see some of you are already ahead of the game. Way to go!

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Occupation: the ugly friend!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,733

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I don’t know how to knit, so I made you a tinfoil hat.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Children really brighten up a home. They never turn the lights off, …

Making waves on Facebook:

Exorcist came by. Says house isn’t possessed, just incredibly poorly built.

Just shared via WeChat:

Old Spice doesn’t sound like something you wanna smell.

Going viral on YouTube:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, I shut it off and back on again, why are you still here?

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’m professionally employed and personally unhinged. Balance.

Live now on Reddit:

Some people are like sunglasses: your day just becomes so much brighter when you accidentally drop them off the side of the boat.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

My summer body has been pending for about ten years.

Just shared via Reddit:

“It’s swimsuit season” I say, eating another swimsuit.

Making waves on X:

Those 8 hours at work go by quickly when you call off.

Body: Time to sleep. Brain: Hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

3 weeks ago

Witty quote about overthinking sleep and endless ideas, capturing a humorous, playful vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Body: Time to sleep. Brain: Hey, that's an interesting thought, here's six billion more. 🧠💭💤 When your brain hits you with a late-night brainstorming session just as you're drifting off to dreamland… Thanks, brain, but can we reschedule this meeting for, oh, never? 😂🌙 #OveractiveBrain #LateNightMusings

billion, body, brain, distraction, humor, insomnia, overthinking, six, sleep, thought, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on Reddit this month:

I know it’s bad, and you’ve got to shut it down right away, but is there anything more hilarious than a swearing toddler?

53 shares on X this month:

I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think outside the box. I don’t even know where the box is.

80 shares on X this month:

Some of you need to clean your room before you take a selfie.

98 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m going to hell in every religion.

63 shares on Slack this month:

The problem with meal prep is you have to eat the meal that you prepped.

56 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m about to start telling people, “As long as that makes sense to you,” when they say shit that doesn’t make sense to me.

83 shares on Slack this month:

Just came back from my walk, and I was right about everything.

68 shares on X this month:

Silence is my favourite form of communication in the morning.

54 shares on Discord this month:

If all men are the same, why does it take women so long to choose one?

77 shares on WhatsApp this month:

There is no physical evidence to say that today is Tuesday, we all just have to trust that someone kept count since the first one ever.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Me pulling into a full parking lot: Don’t these people have homes?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Donuts hug you from the inside.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Life hack: if you run out of treadmill space for your clothes, get a piano.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My toxic trait is thinking every inconvenience is the universe personally attacking me.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Normalise following up to an ignored email with “helllooooooo?”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Make sure you bury me near a bathroom because death is long, and I’m sure I’ll still have to get up and pee.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

My dog just tracked and successfully located a folium lanceolatum, more commonly known as a leaf.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss the good ol’ days until I remember things like having to get out of my chair and smack the TV to get a clearer picture.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Social media needs to crash for like a year so society can recalibrate.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,742

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

We all have that one coworker whose sole purpose is to reduce our life expectancy by ten years.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Sometimes a girl has to delete all the apps on her phone and not speak to anyone for a week to find true happiness.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

“I hate small talk!” Oh okay. Do you think all your grandparents are going to heaven?

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

If I walk into a girl’s house and she got like 50 plants, I know she’s a keeper because she already takes care of a bunch of useless things. What’s one more?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

The dragon with the girl tattoo.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

The first person to see a peacock spread his tail probably had a heart attack.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

I’m trying to shower you with affection. It doesn’t matter how I got into your bathroom.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

The best piece of dating advice I’ve ever received is “If they like you, you’ll know. If they don’t, you’ll be confused.” Honestly, it’s all you need to know.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

No matter how sad you are, there is some form of potato that can make it better.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

No, you’re not a “prompt engineer,” you’re a sloperator.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Slack:

I am re-watching “Narcos,” and I have to say that for someone who smokes so much weed, Pablo Escobar gets a lot done.

Just shared via YouTube:

I always fear that one day I will enter my house and find a thief, knocked out unconscious by the things fallen on his head from some closet.

Trending via X:

My dogs have learned that whenever they hear the f-word in the kitchen, there’s now food on the floor.

Just shared via YouTube:

The best part of vacation with your extended family is talking shit about them on the trip home.

Just landed via Threads:

If a dog growled at me, I would try to understand where they’re coming from.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

Freshly posted on Slack:

You can make friends in a doctor’s waiting room as long as you have something broken and not something coughing.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Having to pee when you’re driving is problematic. Having to sneeze when you’re driving is even more problematic.

Breaking via X:

Work again? Really? Didn’t I just do that yesterday?

Seen just now on Threads:

Fake laughing with customers is actually a job skill.

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