Can everyone please turn their A/C off during the day, we need that power to generate images of people with eight fingers.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Went to HR to complain about my coworkers but my mom said she can’t fire my kids.

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I love being left to my own devices. It’s like yeah, these are my devices.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

I’m the guy at Apple who makes sure all your featured photos are your exes and your dog that died.

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Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

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Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

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If you’re looking for another bad decision, I’m here.

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I like that blood pressure kits come with a free, handy zip-up bag that your stuff will never fit in again once you take it out.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

I wish I was as tired in bed at night as I am after lunch at work.

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It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

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I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.