Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

“How would you describe yourself.” Me: I absolutely would not.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

I’m actually really peace-loving, but then there are other people.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Breakfast in bed: where your cozy blanket turns into a crumby crime scene.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

I thought there was a spider on the rug but it was just yarn. It’s dead yarn now though.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

“You should exercise for at least 30 minutes every day”. Okay, and how much if you’re not trying to go to the Olympics?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

If your name is “Guy”, you have lazy parents.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Why is incognito mode always associated with freaky shit? I use it to search up very obvious questions, so there’s no record of me looking dumb.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

If you ever feel like something’s missing in your life, it’s probably me.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

8 year gap on resume that just says “karate”.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

I’ve reached the age where people talk loudly and slowly to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

292 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,561

Funny Quotes Topics

17,615

Funny Quotes Images

15,561

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,374

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Instagram:

Porn actresses envy the look on my face when I clean my ear with a cotton bud.

Breaking via Instagram:

My dream is to buy a horse and race it. The horse will probably beat me but it’ll still be fun.

Just shared via Slack:

Every time your mom tells you that she wants the best for you, she is talking about me.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

My my husband’s favorite thing is when I blame him for losing something that’s actually in my hand.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I don’t remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a broke, stressed-out, over-thinker with no clothes that fit.

Going viral on X:

People said follow your dreams, so I went back to bed.

Making waves on Reddit:

Y’all aren’t taking beautiful women to jazz clubs anymore, and that’s the problem.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Grandma complained that with age, her joints were getting weaker. Told her to just roll them a little tighter.

Trending via Facebook:

We really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.

Trending via Snapchat:

You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.

Currently into monogamous friendships. If you have other friends, please don’t talk to me, it hurts my heart.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Feeling like the human embodiment of a needy, jealous cat 🐱🚫 Friendship monogamy only for this one! 😂 #FriendingForeverAlone"

exclusivity, friends, friendship, heart, humor, hurt, hurts, me, monogamous, relationship, talk

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

December. A desperate celebration of an end.

2 months ago

celebration, December, end, festivity, holidays, humor, irony, reflection
I went from dancing with myself in the 80s to talking to myself now.

5 months ago

80s, dancing, humor, i, myself, nostalgia, reflection, self, solitude, talking
My Indian name would be “Stares at Phone All Day.”

5 months ago

addiction, day, humor, indian, Indian name, name, phone, phone addiction, smartphone, stares, staring, technology
Imagine marrying an old man for money and you die first.

2 months ago

die, humor, irony, joke, life, man, marriage, money, old, old man, relationship, wealth
Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

5 months ago

able, anger, being, drama, flip, flip phone, frustration, humor, miss, nostalgia, phone, shut
It’s crazy how social media convinced us that 15 likes aren’t enough. Imagine 15 people in real life telling you that you looked good.

2 months ago

comparison, compliments, convinced, crazy, culture, enough, good, imagine, life, likes, media, online, online culture, people, real, real life, self-esteem, self-worth, social, social comparison, social media, telling, us, validation, virtual, virtual validation

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

85 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t even get disappointed anymore. I’m just like, “Oh, again? Okay.”

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

I need to stop drinking so much. Did I say drinking? I meant thinking. I definitely need to drink more.

87 shares on YouTube this month:

Sundries sounds like something grandma would call scandalous underwear.

21 shares on Telegram this month:

I like when the superheroes that can fly pick up and carry the ones that can’t.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

I don’t have time for anything that doesn’t set my soul on fire.

11 shares on Facebook this month:

I’ve been reading the room for 20 minutes. It’s not looking so good.

95 shares on Threads this month:

Shaved my bush and went down a pants size.

92 shares on Facebook this month:

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

32 shares on Facebook this month:

Napping is the best activity for weight loss, because I can’t eat anything when I’m asleep!

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

I visited my doctor today. He told me my sugar was too high. So I came home and moved it to a lower shelf.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Just cleaned out my junk drawer if anyone needs a CD to reinstall Windows 95.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

In a massage chair at the mall just moaning really loud.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

I said it was my favorite show, I didn’t say it was good.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Billionaires are so weird. What are you saving up for? Hell?

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

I used to mix Mountain Dew with the cheapest vodka I could find, and I called it the Blood of Mannaroth because it’s green and turns you into an orc.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

Having an empty laundry basket is the best 5 seconds of my life.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

My boyfriend invited the neighbors over for dinner, “sometime,” so now we have to move.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

Bro, you will never rewatch that 7-minute video you took of fireworks. Just live in the moment.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Texting random numbers “It’s done.”

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

Never faked an orgasm before, but the joy of ugly presents.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I love when my cat sighs at me, like what’s got you stressed out my little freeloading homicidal maniac!?

Just shared via Reddit:

If you ever need me, call me any time, day or night, and I’ll return your call when I get around to it.

Live now on YouTube:

Underrated life skill: only doing what feels genuinely right and letting everything else go.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Nobody is doing it like me because this is probably not the right way to do it.

Shared recently on Slack:

We seriously need to bring back courting. What the hell is ‘wyd tonight?’ Arrive on a horse and bring flowers like a man.

Seen just now on Telegram:

You look like you suck at Mario Kart.

Just shared via Instagram:

“You smell so good!” Okay, so kiss me.

Just landed via YouTube:

My body is in shock this morning from having to wake up early and wear hard pants.

Just landed via X:

Shorts should be half the price of pants.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Currently into monogamous friendships. If you have other friends, please don’t talk to me, it hurts my heart.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

December. A desperate celebration of an end.

I went from dancing with myself in the 80s to talking to myself now.

My Indian name would be “Stares at Phone All Day.”

Imagine marrying an old man for money and you die first.

Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

It’s crazy how social media convinced us that 15 likes aren’t enough. Imagine 15 people in real life telling you that you looked good.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨