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Commentary:
"Hey there! Are you Black Friday, because you've got me feeling like I need to fight through crowds just to uncover your irresistible discounts! 💸🛍️ #SavageSavings"

black, Black Friday, dating, deal, flirt, Friday, girl, humor, joke, line, pickup, pickup line, wondering

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Work for a living? In this economy?

0

2 months ago

economy, humor, job, living, sarcasm, struggle, work
I should’ve existed as a tree.

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2 months ago

choices, existed, existence, humor, i, identity, life, life choices, nature, tree
Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

0

2 months ago

application, ask, company, confusion, employment, humor, irony, job, online, open, open position, position, positions, post, recruitment
Croutons feel like an apology. “Sorry we gave you salad. Have some consolation toast.”

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2 months ago

apology, consolation, crouton, feel, food, humor, salad, sorry, toast
I’ve been having a rough day for about 5 years now.

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2 months ago

5, day, exaggeration, having, humor, life, life struggle, long time, rough, rough day, sarcasm, struggle, time
You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.

0

3 weeks ago

actual, break, date, even, humor, just, life, love, meet, meeting, relationship, somewhere, take, unexpected, unexpected meeting

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on X this month:

I think it broke my boyfriend’s heart when I said he couldn’t have Salma Hayek for Valentine’s Day.

56 shares on Telegram this month:

Distance is my jam; solitude is my peanut butter.

24 shares on X this month:

Before Google, if you didn’t know something you had to go ask someone and most of the time they couldn’t help you, and now that’s also how Google works.

10 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Can the AI bubble just pop already? Everyone hates this crap.

30 shares on TikTok this month:

You know when you tap a video to see how long it’s got left? I wish you could do that to people while they’re talking.

11 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Book reviews be like: “5 stars. I’m sobbing. I’m unwell. I haven’t eaten in 16 hours. Highly recommend.”

16 shares on Facebook this month:

Me, with $33 left after paying bills: Let’s see how much a Land Rover costs.

15 shares on WeChat this month:

“It’s swimsuit season” I say, eating another swimsuit.

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I tried to scream into the abyss today but got a busy signal.

22 shares on X this month:

I can’t stand people who require so much validation. Please like and share this if you agree.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

WhatsApp shouldn’t just display “seen”, but also “lies” and “also writes with other girls”!

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

I held the door for an old person today and he was like, “didn’t we go to high school together” and we did.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Getting older just means that you have to start eating all the sad foods.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Sometimes you send an email that requires a response, and the other person writes back right away, and it’s like NO NOT YET.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

Whenever my Mother-in-Law’s stories end with “And I turned out OK” I’m looking around like who’s gonna tell her.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m only an introvert until I meet people worth extroverting with.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Why can’t opportunity just come back later?

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

You do not have to prove your own humanity to others. Unless it’s a captcha.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

There’s just one legitimate synonym for Friday: boom shakalaka.

Freshly posted on Threads:

No one is excited to see me in shorts except mosquitoes.

Shared recently on Slack:

I’m convinced a lot of people online are communicating from prison.

Making waves on Reddit:

I think it’s time I find myself a new inspiration, asking myself “what would Batman do?” gets me in too much trouble.

Going viral on Facebook:

When they make a Hate Island, somebody link me.

Making waves on YouTube:

Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

Going viral on Facebook:

To accommodate the size of my wife’s new water bottle, we’ve replaced the passenger seat of her car with a cupholder.

Going bananas on Reddit:

And then I thought to myself, “What’s the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?”

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Wondering when these skinny jeans are gonna kick in.

Just shared via YouTube:

Saw a big spider crawl into my closet last night. He’s probably in there trying on all my clothes, acting like he’s me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Damn, girl, are you Black Friday? Because I’m wondering what your bloody deal is.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Work for a living? In this economy?

I should’ve existed as a tree.

Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

Croutons feel like an apology. “Sorry we gave you salad. Have some consolation toast.”

I’ve been having a rough day for about 5 years now.

You don’t even have to date, by the way. You can just take a break from love and then randomly meet the actual love of your life somewhere you weren’t even supposed to be.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨