Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.
  • “It’s the most wonderful crime of the year!” I crooned running away with the pot of Santa’s donations.
  • You should get a pension for having to go to school for so many years.
  • Just remembered why I went upstairs yesterday.
  • Me, at the intervention: “Ah look, all the reasons I drink gathered in one place.”
  • You better be kissing the screen when I send pics.