Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Well, maybe they just wanted to stab in style? 🤷‍♂️ Or perhaps they were promoting a double-edged approach to conflict resolution! 🔪💥 Just hoping nobody shows up with a cannon next time! 🤣"

bayonet, bring, explain, fight, gun, humor, irony, knife, logic, me, okay, weapons

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I get it, funds… I, too, am insufficient.

0

4 months ago

am, financial, financial struggle, fund, funds, humor, i, insufficiency, money, pun, struggle, too, wordplay
Viewing someone’s LinkedIn after they’ve viewed yours to assert dominance.

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3 months ago

after, behavior, dominance, humor, LinkedIn, media, networking, online, online behavior, social, social media, yours
The downside to getting in a hammock is having to get out of the hammock.

0

2 months ago

comfort, downside, funny observation, furniture, getting, hammock, having, observation, outdoor, outdoor furniture, relaxation, struggle
Serious replies to silly posts are now illegal. Go talk to your wife.

0

2 months ago

humor, humorist, illegal, joke, media, posts, relationship, sarcasm, serious, seriousness, silliness, silly, social, social media, talk, wife
I love Queen and David Bowie, but why did they steal that riff from Vanilla Ice?

0

4 months ago

bowie, culture, david, David Bowie, humor, i, ice, love, music, musician, parody, pop, pop culture, queen, riff, song, steal, vanilla, Vanilla Ice, why
You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

0

2 months ago

arrest, arrested, call, communication, humor, ig, IG story, jail, life, media, modern, modern life, phone, phone call, should, social, social media, story

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on X this month:

“But it’s summer,” is going to be my excuse for everything from now until the end of September.

89 shares on Slack this month:

Yes, officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn’t see your car.

43 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Egg nog was invented in Germany back in 1816 when Baron von Heldebrandt reportedly said “Hey guys, let’s get this custard drunk!”

78 shares on Threads this month:

Nothing has improved the quality of my life more than living beyond my means.

100 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m not joining no alternate Twitter app. If this gets taken down, I’m starting a family.

20 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m at the age where a house arrest no longer sounds like the worst thing.

72 shares on Discord this month:

Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like ‘I don’t know how to hold a pencil.’

38 shares on YouTube this month:

I miss being the age where the most devastating thing in the world was when my sandwiches got cut into squares instead of triangles.

11 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s not my job to police the internet, but I just saw someone post a recipe for a cauliflower cake, and I reported them for harmful content.

13 shares on Threads this month:

The only ex I cheated on is my exam.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Nobody is busier than a woman who isn’t into you.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

I’m not saying I’ve aged like fine wine, but I am currently being stored in a dark place and avoiding sunlight at all costs.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

Can I come over and crawl around on you like a bug?

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

I see WWIII is about to kick off again. I’d best cancel the milk and get the cat in.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Accidentally falling asleep is always the best sleep — and that’s so irritating.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

I say “long story short,” and suddenly we’re in Act III with an intermission.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

If I like cleaning? Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

I refuse to learn the color coding for heart emojis. Your heart means what I want it to, and vice versa.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Just caught a moth and sent it back outside. Feeling like Mr. Miyagi.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Marriage is like a phone call at the night: First there’s the ring, and then you wake up.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

If you’ve been talking for 5 minutes straight, it might be someone else’s turn.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I will marry a tall, masculine, lovey-dovey man who can’t breathe when I ignore his existence.

Just shared via Instagram:

Experts say you can make any statement sound more credible by adding ‘experts say’ at the beginning.

Going viral on Twitch:

You can’t truly refer to yourself as an adult until you catch yourself getting really angry when the grocery store changes their layout.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Haunted house idea: a poorly lit Walmart littered with people you haven’t seen since high school.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I’ve reached the age where people talk loudly and slowly to me.

Spotted on X:

The gap in my resume is because I was trying to reach enlightenment for 5 years.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I hope this email finds you in the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty.

Live now on Telegram:

I would be more patient if it didn’t take so long.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Sometimes the whole point of going out is to then really savor coming back home.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“Don’t bring a knife to a gun fight!” Okay, then explain bayonets to me.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I get it, funds… I, too, am insufficient.

Viewing someone’s LinkedIn after they’ve viewed yours to assert dominance.

The downside to getting in a hammock is having to get out of the hammock.

Serious replies to silly posts are now illegal. Go talk to your wife.

I love Queen and David Bowie, but why did they steal that riff from Vanilla Ice?

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨