Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Every morning when that damn alarm clock goes off, I just feel it so much: A million-dollar inheritance suits me much better than an office job.
  • Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.
  • Feeling lonely? Just glue a coffee cup to the roof of your car. Everyone will wave to you.
  • I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
  • Not to brag but I gave someone directions and he made it.
  • If you don’t believe aliens walk amongst us, who else could write such unnatural dialogue in pharmaceutical commercials?