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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

If you see me sad, just hug me and put some money in my pocket.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

My body feels like it’s aging in dog years.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Don’t rush me, I’m still deciding whether I’ll be productive or not today!

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

I put the “pro” in procrastinate.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Nature is fascinating. A dandelion makes it through concrete, while I get my head stuck in my sweater in the morning.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Just because the deodorant says 48 hours, it does not mean you have to challenge it.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

How do I gracefully leave this party early but also take the queso dip with me?

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

There’s a cougar warning in my neighborhood, but apparently it’s just a big cat. I bought a case of wine coolers for nothing.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

A mustache is just mouth bangs.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,953

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,953

30 minutes ago

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Facebook:

Yes, I’m full of microplastics, but it’s actually been helpful. It’s given me superpowers. I can communicate with Tupperware.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Twitter is fun because you can tweet about hashbrowns and someone will say you are responsible for genocide.

Just landed via Threads:

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

Shared recently on TikTok:

If only my bank balance was as high as my daily calorie intake.

Trending via Discord:

You know what brought my home value up? Not having an angry man in it.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Welcome to your 40s. Your eyes are now like a camera someone doesn’t know how to focus.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Cover letters are so embarrassing. Why am I writing a love letter to this shitty company?

Making waves on YouTube:

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

Spotted on Instagram:

When life gives you lemons maybe think to yourself, “that’s really quite remarkable given how far I live from a climate capable of growing citrus.”

Just landed via LinkedIn:

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything, and all you can think is: “Act normal, you are innocent.”

Extrovert self made too many plans and now introvert self is pissed.

6 months ago

Extrovert self made too many plans and now introvert self is pissed.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like extrovert self booked a one-way ticket to FOMO-land, leaving introvert self stranded in the peaceful sanctuary of JOMO bliss. 🎉🤯🤷‍♂️ Time to reschedule those plans and find the perfect balance between social butterfly mode and hermit crab mode! 🦋🦀 #IntrovertStruggles #ExtrovertDrama #FindingTheSweetSpot

conflict, expectations, extrovert, introvert, personality, pissed, plans, self, social, too

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,953

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,953

30 minutes ago

3,419

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Why is everyone so chill about parrots being able to talk? That’s a whole animal. Talking.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Sorry, my face wasn’t created to hide that much distain for what you’re saying.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

If you ever find yourself mad at me, put a cape on so you can be super mad.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Time travel is all well and good, but I feel so stupid right now. None of them have the mustache. No way to tell which baby is Hitler.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Young people are too young nowadays. Back in the good old days, young people were my age.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

I like warm weather but only to a certain degree.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

I get sad when I see how old people my age are.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

You can just make up words and if you say them in a Scottish accent, people will think they’re real: Looka the wee janglers on that tary bibbit.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

There’s a Marie Antoinette feeling in the air.

Making waves on Threads:

When a lady compliments your facial hair, have the goddamn decency to compliment hers.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Jeez. It’s like the people in this nursing home have never heard techno before.

Just landed via X:

When I turned into the harbor of marriage, I didn’t know that a warship was anchored there.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

It’s really hard to come back after a poorly executed high five.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Dear life, when I said “can this day get any worse” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.

Spotted on Messenger:

Have you tried complaining about it?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

The best part about Smarties is pouring them into an empty prescription bottle and shaking them all into my mouth while waiting in line.

Just landed via Slack:

I would only enjoy the Met Gala if at the end of that runway they all walked into a volcano.

Spotted on WeChat:

Dating scene and the job market are the same right now, just stay where you are.

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