Finally figured out why I look so bad in pictures – it’s my face.

96 shares on Messenger this month:

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

18 shares on Slack this month:

Men can stay up til 2 a.m., wake up at 6, be in debt, broke, alone, and still have faith that one day, everything will work out. It’s called being a man.

46 shares on TikTok this month:

Unfortunately, I do enjoy watching the downfall of people who did me wrong.

62 shares on Facebook this month:

There’s a special place in hell for people like you (next to me).

97 shares on Snapchat this month:

Getting my next boyfriend a flip phone. He doesn’t need anything more.

67 shares on Pinterest this month:

I wonder if the scariest moment ever in history has happened yet.

31 shares on LinkedIn this month:

How was the word “Wife” invented? They took the first two and last two letters of wildlife.

57 shares on Instagram this month:

I hear the responses my young siblings give my mom, and I’m speechless; they don’t know the commando she was in her prime.

35 shares on Telegram this month:

I need a horror movie where a kidnapper abducts a possessed child and finds out.

67 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing.