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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Not only is it not Friday, it’s not even Thursday.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Just blocked someone for correcting my spelling and it feelded great.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

Did you ever stop to ask how Mercury feels about being in retrograde? No, because you only think about yourself.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

“It can’t get any worse than this”, I lie to myself knowing it will absolutely get worse.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

If he has other girls who make him smile, be different and make him cry.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

One day you said w00t for the last time, and didn’t even realize.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

I’m at that point in my life where if a car hit me, I’d probably say thank you to the kind stranger.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

How many of you also constantly take screenshots of something and then never look at them again?

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

I don’t mean to disrupt the hotel industry, but how about checkout is 24 hours after you check in?

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

Life is so exciting. I was in my bedroom and now I’m in the living room. Who knows where I’ll go next.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2432 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,594

Funny Quotes Topics

15,263

Funny Quotes Images

12,594

57 minutes ago

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

If you wait until the last minute to do something, it only takes a minute to do it.

Shared recently on Telegram:

If a beer is 8 bucks, it’s a show. If a beer is 14 bucks, it’s a concert.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Sometimes I just stand in the sun and stare at nothing, like a dog.

Spotted on Facebook:

I feel like whoever named them rice cakes has never actually eaten a cake.

Spotted on Slack:

Remember, when asking for a raise, it is considered customary to be sober.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Asbestos? I’m doing asbestos I can.

Going viral on Pinterest:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s Wednesday.

Just landed via TikTok:

I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Trending via Telegram:

Once you start paying rent, every joke stops being funny.

For my birthday, I want everyone to tell me how much they love me and why in immense detail.

Jan 28, 2025

For my birthday, I want everyone to tell me how much they love me and why in immense detail.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the classic birthday wish – to bask in a shower of love and compliments! 🎉🥳🎈 Nothing says "celebration" quite like a thorough appraisal of your fabulousness, right? Just make sure to have some tissues on standby for the tears of joy and the occasional eye roll from your friends. After all, it's your special day, and what better way to indulge in a bit of self-love than by demanding it from others? 😜

attention, birthday, celebration, detail, everyone, humor, i, love, me, much, request, tell, want, why

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2432 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,594

Funny Quotes Topics

15,263

Funny Quotes Images

12,594

57 minutes ago

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Plants are like “I’ll have a light lunch.”

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

How great is it to do absolutely nothing and follow it up by taking a rest.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Is there a rehab for introverts who try to extrovert? Asking for a friend.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

My secret talent is turning any situation into a considerably more awkward one.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Weddings should have a worst man.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

If swimming is such good exercise, explain whales.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

I grew up in a really small town. The closest thing we had to food delivery was someone egging your house.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Your call is very important to us, here’s six days of irritating music.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

(Talking to myself) I just don’t know what to tell you.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

I don’t know why doctors only give stickers to kids? Like, hello, I was also brave today.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

Shared recently on Discord:

The most attractive thing a man can do is hitting his own head and repeating “stupid, stupid, stupid”.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

My dream is being pitted against the world’s greatest AI in a writing contest and crafting a story that’s so beautiful that I make the computer cry.

Making waves on Discord:

Tweeting with no audience feels like screaming jokes into a cornfield.

Shared recently on Reddit:

At the plastic surgeon: Please, Doc, help me. My Barbie doll has appendicitis.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

Trending via Facebook:

Despite removing all the stains, I still lost my job as a church window cleaner.

Reported on Slack:

Please don’t leave me to my own devices. They’re all out of batteries.

Reported on Threads:

Okay, this integrity isn’t going to compromise itself.

Live now on TikTok:

‘Blinded by the Light’ is really just a song about turning the bathroom light on in the middle of the night.

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