97 Funny absurdity quotes

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Mad that so many renaissance artists were named after ninja turtles.

  Commentary:
  "Renaissance art lovers be like: Leonardo da Vinci, Raphael, Donatello, and Michelangelo… Was Splinter their art instructor?! 🎨🐢 #TeenageMutantArtists"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth.

  Commentary:
  "Isn't it bizarre how we nonchalantly house a meaty tentacle in our mouths? 🦑 It's like having a strange, unsuspecting roommate who loves to taste-test everything before we do. 🤪 Maybe we should throw a tiny welcome party for our tongue next time! 🎉 #MeatTentacleLife"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: What we need is more companies making hot sauce. I need 900 more ways to taste a thing that tastes exactly like all the other ones.

  Commentary:
  Well, well, well, if it isn't the spiciest take on the condiment game! 🌶️🔥 Looks like someone's burning up with desire for some variety in their life. 900 more ways to taste the same thing? That's one way to turn up the heat on the culinary scene! 🔥🌶️ Who knew hot sauce could bring out the saucy side in all of us? 😉

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  6 months ago

  Share →: While a leaf blower is a close second, my preferred cleaner is a flamethrower.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a broom when you can flambé the mess away? 🔥🍂 Though, maybe save the flamethrower for the backyard and stick with the leaf blower for inside the house! 😄 #CleaningInStyle"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Never forget that your fave celebs were trying to sell you cartoon monkey pictures during a pandemic.

  Commentary:
  Oh, the irony of it all! 🙈🦠 It’s a true testament to the unpredictable nature of celebrity endorsements – who knew our fave celebs would turn to cartoon monkeys in times of crisis? 🐒💁‍♂️ Remember, sometimes even the biggest stars make questionable choices while navigating through uncertain times! #PandemicPloys 🌟

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this makes no sense, microwave.

  Commentary:
  🌹🤷‍♂️ "Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this poem's logic took a wrong turn… and ended up in a microwave! 🔄🔥"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

  Commentary:
  Well, that would be quite the starch-tacular challenge! 🏊‍♂️ Just imagine the creamy strokes and gravy turns you'd have to master. 💪 Swim-a-licious or mash madness, you decide! 🥔 #SpudtasticAdventure

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