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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

I don’t know who needs to hear this right now, but it’s time to fold the laundry that’s been lying around since last Sunday.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

When something Asian becomes popular enough, it becomes Mexican.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Overthinking should at least burn calories.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Want to come over? We can trauma dump, take a nap, and then order a pizza and watch a movie.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

The guy in the stall beside doesn’t know he can shut off his camera shutter.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

After having a week off, my boss returns to work today. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I’d rather you don’t watch me while I’m liking my own post.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

The only thing keeping me from world domination is a good nap.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

I bought some coconut shampoo today. I got halfway home before I thought, “I don’t even have a coconut!”

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

My favorite color is money.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,723

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

Sorry about all of the correct stuff I said when I was right.

Just shared via TikTok:

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

Spotted on Snapchat:

All these laws are really getting in the way of my driving.

Just landed via Slack:

If you hide the Easter eggs while you’re drunk, nobody knows where they are.

Live now on Twitch:

Prior to the arrival of Paper and Scissors, Rock faced no competition.

Seen just now on X:

Age ceases to be just a number everytime the airline announces seating queue priority.

Shared recently on WeChat:

My life changed when I learned some house spiders can’t survive outside, so now I just catch them and release them in a friend’s home.

Spotted on Facebook:

What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

Live now on Reddit:

I like my bed more than I like most people.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Updated

Dec 1, 2025

Users Online

3,984

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Inventing the Grinch: “Santa needs a Wario!”

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

I feel like we’re on like the 50th or 60th horseman of the apocalypse by now.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Broke my work phone. I can’t talk on it anymore. I should have done this a long time ago.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

For Halloween, I wanna be loved.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I think about starting a podcast and then I remember all I do during conversations is nod.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

If I were you, I would rather be me.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

There should be a socially acceptable way to say, “I’m not sure what to say to that. Can you please say something different?”.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

The human brain is amazing. It functions 24/7 from the day we’re born and only stops when you’re taking a test or speaking to someone attractive.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Discord:

I like my bed more than I like most people.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Basketball’s all like “gimme that pumpkin, I need it” and golf is all like “***k this egg, imma hit it into the sun”

Just shared via Threads:

If a vegetarian who eats fish is a pescatarian, is a vegetarian who eats chicken called a poultrygeist?

Spotted on YouTube:

You can’t spell dyslexia without sexy.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball isn’t for throwing at people who stress you out?

Seen just now on Instagram:

Who really needs jetpacks, I want to be able to start over from my last save point.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Welcome to your 40’s: it’s ten years of people saying “wait until you’re 50”.

Spotted on X:

If caterpillars are able to sleep for a long time and come out prettier, why cant I?

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.

Live now on Snapchat:

I’ll never be badass enough to walk around chewing on a toothpick.

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