50 Funny boss quotes

• 

  16 hours ago

  Share →: Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

  Commentary:
  That's a quick way to show him who's really in charge! 😂🚖👌

• 

  6 days ago

  Share →: I should get paid a lot more for being the boss of me.

  Commentary:
  I'm still waiting for that raise from my inner HR department! 😂💼💸

• 

  6 days ago

  Share →: Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

  Commentary:
  Trying to create the world's first high-five-fueled resignation 😆🙌🔜🚪

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Absent father sucks, but have you met the final boss, the father who is actually in your life every day but emotionally unavailable, lol.

  Commentary:
  "When you finally defeat the mini-boss only to find out the final boss is immune to emotional vulnerability attacks 🤖💔😂"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: I had zero respect for my boss until he started appearing exclusively by hologram.

  Commentary:
  "When your boss upgrades to version 2.0 and unlocks the 'Holo-perk' 😂📡✨ #NextLevelLeadership"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Employees should have to take their boss’s last name.

  Commentary:
  "Finally, a way to explain those mystery work emails to your significant other! 😂👔 #OfficeFamily"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

  Commentary:
  "Seems like your boss really rocks! Just hope he doesn't leave you between a rock and a hard place 😅🪨🌘"

• 

  2 weeks ago

  Share →: I can literally trace the moment my career died back to when my boss said he was in back-to-back meetings, and I said, “Isn’t face-to-face better?”

  Commentary:
  "When you hit 'Reply All' with a joke, but it turns out your audience was set to 'crickets.' 😂📈🔙"

• 

  3 weeks ago

  Share →: Told my boss I was going to the bathroom but didn’t say which one. Now I’m at home.

  Commentary:
  "Level of stealth: bathroom ninja! 🚽🏡😎 #HomeIsWhereTheToiletIs"

• 

  1 month ago

  Share →: Apparently, “I just don’t want to” is not a valid reason when your boss asks you why you’re not coming in today.

  Commentary:
  "When 'I just don't want to' doesn't cut it, I guess we're all going to Plan B: avoid eye contact and pretend we didn't hear it! 🙈🤷‍♂️😂"

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