Funny Boss Quotes That Will Have You Laughing at Work! 💼😂

I don’t like the person I become when my boss tells me I should be working while at work.

3 months ago2 months ago

Boss: You’ll never find another job like this. Me: That’d be great.

3 months ago2 months ago

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my train wreck of a life.

3 months ago2 months ago

You can’t boss me around. You’re not my bladder.

3 months ago2 months ago

Boss: Why do I have to always come and find you? Me: Because a good employee is hard to find.

3 months ago2 months ago

Putting a blanket over my boss so he thinks it’s night time and goes to sleep.

3 months ago2 months ago

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

3 months ago2 months ago

How do I even know this guy is my “boss”? I’ve just been taking his word for it.

4 months ago2 months ago

My boss said he likes how I remain so calm under pressure. Can’t tell him it’s because I don’t give a shit.

5 months ago2 months ago

HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

5 months ago2 months ago

To anybody who thinks being self-employed means you don’t have to work for a boss you hate, I have terrible news.

5 months ago2 months ago

A tip for your next salary negotiation: simply tell your boss “either I get a pay rise or I go out and tell everyone I got one!”

5 months ago2 months ago

My boss doesn’t want dogs in the office. But he didn’t say anything about alpacas.

5 months ago2 months ago

The Pope is the only employee who never gets to see his boss. Not even at the Christmas party.

May 20, 20242 months ago

My boss just left which means I have finished all of my work for the day.

May 11, 20242 months ago

My mom always used to tell me that I look cute when I sleep. My boss has a different opinion.

May 7, 20242 months ago

Texting my boss to let him know how excited I am for work tomorrow.

Sep 25, 20232 months ago

My boss told me “It’s not rocket science.” Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science.

Sep 22, 20232 months ago

My boss told me to start every presentation with a joke. The first slide was my paycheck.

Sep 22, 20232 months ago

I’m not bossy, I just know exactly what you should be doing.

Sep 22, 20232 months ago

Holiday dinners with family are like real life boss levels with the worst loot.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my trainwreck of a life.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 30, 2023

I don’t jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023

Apparently “ew no” is not an acceptable way to tell my boss I don’t want more responsibility at work.

Sep 22, 2023Sep 25, 2023

Me: This show is really boring. Boss: Again, this a zoom conference.

Sep 22, 20232 months ago