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Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

I hate the person I become when I try to open a package using the ‘Tear Here’ notch, and it stays sealed.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Everyone has that one friend they’ve known for years and still have no idea what they actually do for a living, but it’s too late to ask.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

I have found that there is usually a lot of day left at the end of my patience.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

I’m beginning to think that for some of you, the wheels on the bus do not go round and round.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

I hope some dyslexic people don’t mail Satan instead of Santa.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Clueless but committed – that’s my vibe.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Most divorces are caused by a spouse eating potato chips while you try to watch TV.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Hello bedtime my old friend, my brain is laughing once again.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Some people pack their lives so full of activities, appointments and people that I get exhausted just reading about it.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

No matter how weird things seem to get, there’s always an episode of The Twilight Zone that was eerily similar.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

509 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,102

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,102

Updated

Dec 24, 2025

Users Online

3,931

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

My kids wanted a spooky story from the olden days so I told them the internet used to scream when you turned it on.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

That “never again” talk with yourself after a certain experience is always funny.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

To the knife wielding psycho who walked in on me in the shower; I’m sorry you had to see that.

Going viral on Facebook:

Considering that doctors are never on time, they should tell you to come a half hour late, not early.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I hate it when I turn on the car in the morning and the music starts blasting… It’s like, woah, I’m not the same person I was last night.

Live now on Slack:

Being single: When you don’t have to wait for someone to watch the next Netflix episode.

Just landed via WeChat:

I have noticed something quite worrying: after I buy more things I have less money.

Making waves on Slack:

What if babies had two umbilical cords and if you cut the wrong one, it exploded?

Going viral on Twitch:

The Netflix “Recommended For You” list is why I have trust issues.

Spotted on TikTok:

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

Home » Funny Cold Beer Quotes

Funny cold beer quotes

New funny cold beer quotes 👇

My ego is bruised so I’m going to ice it with some cold beer.

0

2 months ago

beer, bruised, cold, cold beer, drinking, ego, going, humor, ice, relaxation, self-care

All funny cold beer quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

26 shares on WeChat this month:

I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies. She is not “fun to be around”.

54 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Village life is when you send two kids out to play and six kids come back hungry.

89 shares on Facebook this month:

You don’t have to be crazy to hang out with me. I’ll train you.

20 shares on Telegram this month:

I miss when bills had nothing to do with me.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Getting an entry-level job before the release of ChatGPT in 2022 was like taking the last chopper out of Vietnam. Few realize this yet.

90 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’ve decided that I’m going to underthink today.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

Can’t, I’m pulling it together.

36 shares on WeChat this month:

Asking Santa Claus for nudes.

26 shares on Facebook this month:

I hate how everything is organic now. I miss chemicals.

89 shares on Threads this month:

Maybe in another life, I’m a spoiled nepo baby — jobless and doing nothing but shopping all day with my equally nepotised friends.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

It’s cute when kids say what they want to be when they grow up. You’re gonna write emails on the computer, buddy.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Staring sadly at the empty ice cream bowl that’s too small for licking.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

My mom asked me to hand out invitations for my brother’s surprise birthday party, and that’s when I realized he was the favorite twin.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

I still get so surprised every time someone I find attractive finds me attractive. Like, are you sure?

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

The moon landing was faked. They actually went to Mars, and I can prove it.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

My fight or flight response has frequent flyer miles.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

I kind of miss when people stood 6 feet away.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Twitter is Iike the smoking area for social media.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

You can’t argue with me because I’ll just agree with you until you leave.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Anyone who thinks things have got so bad that they can only get better is showing a remarkable lack of imagination.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

Discord is only good for calling friends on the computer. Please do not waste your time getting caught up in random servers.

Just shared via WeChat:

Mentally, I’m in a forest screaming. Physically, I’m answering emails with a fake smile and clenched jaw.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The main reason I got divorced was cause I got married.

Just landed via Twitch:

“Stop talking about old drama!” God forbid a girl and her bestie enjoy their history lessons.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Nothing like waking up on a Friday and finding out it’s Tuesday.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Either you’re violently frolicking with me or you’re violently frolicking against me.

Spotted on Slack:

If I could turn water into wine, I’d have lots of followers too.

Trending via Pinterest:

Losing jewelry is a different type of hurt.

Freshly posted on X:

Not to be dramatic, but learning how to read has ruined my life.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Funny cold beer quotes

New funny cold beer quotes 👇

My ego is bruised so I’m going to ice it with some cold beer.

All funny cold beer quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨